Tick

Tick. Stop. Tick. Stop. Tick. STOP. TICK. I said STOP. Tick. I know you did. Then why are you still ticking? Tick. Because you want me to.

The boy shook his head and walked to the window that looked out onto the urban forest. Smoke from the factories brushed against his window as he turned away. He opened a small wooden dresser and put on a gray uniform.

Tick. Stop. Tick. You can do it today. I won't. Tick. You can try. I can't.

He grabbed a book bag and left the dull room, closing the steel door behind him as he did so. He made his way down a dark hallway, and then turned down another. Finally, the boy opened two steel doors and entered a room full of children. No one looked at him. Everyone continued talking, muttering, and sleeping through their breakfast. He was nothing. Why would they stop for him?

Tick. You are so sure they don't care. Why won't you try? Maybe I'm worried they will see me as even more of an outcast than I already am. Tick. Maybe they won't. They could like you. No one likes me.

He sat down in the corner of the room alone. Half an hour went by, and in the room full of chattering friends who practically screamed opportunity, he heard nothing but himself. And he was quiet. A bell sounded, but he did not hear. The boy observed the mass of children flowing out of the slowly emptying room. He followed the crowd, but he did not look at anyone. Everyone was shielded away from him in their own groups of friends.

Tick. Why don't you have a group? I'm not important. Tick. You could be.

The boy followed the masses until he reached his classroom. He sat down at his desk, situated in the back corner, pushed away from everyone else. No one noticed or cared. The teacher began a lecture and made notations on the board. The boy regarded the lesson with interest.

Tick. Not now. Tick. Don't you want them to notice you? Not right now. Tick. Let them notice you. I don't want them to. Tick. You are lying. Stop. Tick. STOP. TICK.

"Stop!" The emphatic order escaped his mouth, and the boy felt that every eye that had turned to look at him was full of scorn. The teacher came over to his desk.

"What is it?" she asked him.

"It doesn't matter," he whispered.

"Who are you talking to?" the teacher asked.

"Tick." The parts of the classroom rippled with laughter, and the boy shrank into his desk.

"Silence!" the teacher hissed at her class. She tried to help the boy from his seat and ushered him into the hall. "Stay there. I will call the doctors. I'm sure they will help."

Tick. She cares. The doctors won't understand. Tick. They can try. Why would they? Tick. To help you.

* * *

"He was talking to no one," the teacher explained.

"Do you think he is talking to someone in his head?" asked the taller of the two doctors.

"You can't talk to someone in your head! He's a hopeless case," spat the shorter doctor. The first doctor glared at him and placed his arm around the boy's shoulders.

"Would you mind us asking you a couple of questions?" the taller doctor inquired, as he led him over to a chair. The boy shrugged his shoulders in reply. The doctors came when the teachers were frustrated. Sometimes they tried to help him, and other times they sent him away without allowing an explanation.

"What do you hear?" asked the first doctor.

"Tick," the boy muttered.

"What is 'Tick'?" sneered the second doctor. He rolled his eyes and muttered, "Attention seeker if you ask me. Trying to cause trouble again..." However, the first doctor waved him away and adjusted his glasses with confusion.

"Who or what is Tick?" the doctor asked.

"Someone who is trying to help," the boy spoke, with his head lowered to the floor. The doctor frowned.

"Could you tell me why you need help? Could I help you?" the first doctor. The boy was silent for a moment.

"Tick-sir, I'm sorry. You can't help."

Tick. Let him try. Why should I? Tick. He wants to help you. Lots of people do! No they don't. Tick. They do! Why can't you let them?

The boy raised his head after the doctors turned away. He began to inch towards the door. The doctors continued arguing about trying to help the boy, but the boy kept moving towards the door. He had his hand on the doorknob when the two doctors whipped back around. The boy wasted no time; he pushed as hard as he could against the door.

Tick. Why don't you trust me? Because no one cares! Tick. Why can't you give them a chance? I just can't. Tick. Why can't you give yourself a chance?

The doctors scrambled after him. The first doctor called for him to stop. He said he would help, but the boy knew better. He knew they could not help him. The boy knew they would not believe him. The boy sprinted down the steel walled hallway. He heard the stumbling and shouting behind him, but it did not concern him. He ran up a stairwell and turned down another hallway. Finally, the boy flung open the door to his room and stood in front of the mirror on his desk.

Tick. You are tired of it. I'm fine. Tick. You are not. Let yourself speak. Find someone! You are not helping. Tick. Why am I not helping? I know you can speak. You don't help anything! I know I cannot. I would rather stay in the life I already have. Tick. That's a lie. You want to break your own barricade. Stop. Tick. Accept what you can be. I do not want to be with anyone else. I'm fine on my own! Tick. You are not. You want to be with someone, and you can!

The first doctor appeared in the doorway. He walked over to the boy. The mirror reflected two people. There was no barricade. There was no wall between them, and the boy did not flinch away. He did not try to move from the doctor's side.

Tick? Can I? Tick. You know you can.

The boy looked at himself in the mirror. For the first time, he saw himself without a cage of defense. He was free.

"I'm ready," the boy said. The doctor looked at the boy next to him.

"What are you ready for?" the man asked softly.

"To not be alone anymore," the boy spoke with sincerity. He stared at himself in the mirror and saw something he had not seen for a long time. A smile across the face that was once so alone.

Tick? Tick. Yes? Thank you. 

Author Note: Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed it. Please comment on and share this story. 

-ArgentumCat