I could day dream for hours on end. While working my mind is constantly creating these fantasies about how different my life would be if this or this would happen. If someone walks by I image my life if that person and I were friends. What type of adventures we would go on. What we would do to pass the time.
If I'm listening to the radio I day dream about being friends with that certain band and how we would prank one another and laugh and then write songs about it. Or if I met the band backstage what would I say.
My mind is constantly writing these stories that never take place. Constantly changing the arena. I could be in the grocery store but in my mind as I pick up a pineapple and put it in my basket I'm taken to the beaches of Hawaii where the pineapple is hand picked by a fire breathing Swahili man who is also visiting the large island. As he picks the pineapple and hands it to me our eyes meet and we fall in deep deep love and we run away to one of the smaller islands of Hawaii and live forever in a pineapple house like spongebob. Then a woman asks me if I can move my basket to the side as she needs to get tomatoes that are next to the pineapples. And my mind stops writing that story.
Now I'm on to the next. I picture myself telling that lady to go around me, can't she see I'm trying to decide which fruit is the better fruit. But I move my basket so she can get to the tomatoes.
Constantly at drift in the ocean. My mind is forever wandering the streets. Trying to convince myself that I don't need or want or need or want.
It's not that I don't find my life amazing and exhilarating or baffling at times but my mind can't seem to focus on the day dream of psychosis.
