Manhattan

13.

AIDAN COULD CLEARLY remember the days following his father's death. There had been an eerie silence at home. Days and nights had blurred together, and he had lost all sense of time. That was how he felt now, disoriented and confused as he jogged through the streets of the city, towards Benji's apartment. 

Don't do anything stupid. 

Was this a stupid thing to do? He didn't know, and neither did he care. 

The rundown apartment came into view, and he picked up his pace. There was a buzz in his veins, and he felt adrenaline coursing through him. The need to let his emotions out was empowering, overwhelming. This time, he didn't hold it back. He let it take over him until that was all that was left.

 He ignored the front entrance and went around back, where the fire exits for each of the apartments were. He slowed to read the numbers on them, stopping at 189 - Benji's. He tried the doorknob, surprised to find it unlocked, and slipped inside. 

The sounds of laughter reached his ears. It wasn't a pleasant sound - it was cold and full of mirth, kind of like the laughter that villains in movies did when they'd just committed a horrible crime and were proud of it. It drove a knife inside Aidan, twisting and twisting, deeper and deeper until hatred filled his vision. 

". . . pummeled the kid," Jeremy was saying to someone on the phone. He laughed drunkenly, and took a swig from the beer bottle at his side. 

Don't do anything stupid, Aidan. 

But the warning was meaningless, and before he knew what he was doing he was stepping out into Jeremy's line of sight, who blinked in surprise upon seeing him. 

"What -" Jeremy said, setting his phone down. "What the hell are you -"  

But he didn't have a chance to finish as Aidan rushed towards him, unsure what he was even doing, just knowing that he wanted to let his anger out on the man who'd hurt his best friend, when the front door opened. 

He came to an abrupt stop. Aidan recognized the person who came in as the lady who lived next door, Pat. He felt a sense of relief. He'd known her almost as long as he'd known Benji; she had been Benji's next door neighbour for as long as he could remember. She also happened to be a police officer. Today must have been one of her days off, judging by the lack of uniform. Her mouth dropped open in surprise as she saw them. 

"Oh - what's going on?" she asked, looking from Aidan to Jeremy. "I heard some commotion and I -"  

"I'll tell you what's going on," Jeremy said, glaring at Aidan. "This kid is intruding in my house -" 

"It's not your house," Aidan said through gritted teeth. 

Jeremy whirled on him, but Pat cut in. "Aidan? What's wrong? And where is everyone?"  

"At the hospital," said Aidan angrily, and at Pat's surprised look, he added, "with Benji. Because of him." 

Pat looked at Jeremy. "What - how? What happened?"  

Aidan's jaw worked. "He hit him. He hit Benji."  

"What?" said Pat. Jeremy's face had gained on a new look - one that Aidan recognized to be something akin to fear. 

"I don't know what you're talking about, kid -" Jeremy started. 

"Aidan, that is a very serious accusation," said Pat. 

He stared at her. "Why in the world would I be lying about this, Pat?" 

"Because he's insane," said Jeremy. He scowled at them both. "And you two need to get out of my house. This is a violation of my privacy and I -" 

Pat held up a hand, and Jeremy abruptly shut his mouth. She dug around for something in her pockets, then held up what Aidan saw was a police badge. "I'm a certified police officer," Pat said to Jeremy. "You've been accused of child abuse. I'll need to take you in for questioning."  

Jeremy shook his head. "No. No. This is ridiculous. You have no right -" 

"Aidan, I need you to leave," Pat interrupted. 

"But -"

"Now. I'll handle this."  

He nodded, not wanting to argue. Pat watched as he headed out the front door, then closed the door after him. He pondered pressing his ear to the door and trying to listen in, but that probably wasn't a good idea. Sighing, he headed out the apartment building, the previous buzz in his veins almost completely gone. He still felt an underlying sense of emotion within him, but not enough to overwhelm him. Not enough to give him a need to do something rash and impulsive. 

His phone rang as he hailed a taxi. He got inside, telling the driver the address to his own apartment, and sat back in the seat as he answered the call. 

"Hey, mom," he said tiredly. 

"Aidan, are you home?"

"I'm on my way there," he said. He paused. "Why? Did something happen with Benji?"

"No, no. He's fine. Well, not fine. He's still asleep." She sighed. "I was just checking up on you. Everything okay?" 

He nodded stupidly, then remembered she couldn't see him. "Yes. I'm okay."  

"Good," she said. "Get home safe. We'll talk when I come back. Love you." 

"Love you too," he replied, and hung up the phone. 

• • • 

"I'm sorry," was the first thing he said to his mom when she got home.

She blinked at him in surprise. He sighed. "I shouldn't have said those terrible things to you," he said. "I didn't mean them at all, mom. I don't know what I was thinking -"

She smiled at him softly. "Aidan, it's okay." She pulled him into her arms. "It's alright."

"It's not," he whispered past the lump in his throat. But he let himself be held, let himself bury his head in her shoulder even though he knew he didn't deserve it.

She pulled back, touched his cheek gently. "I know you didn't mean it, Aidan. I know. And besides, we have other things to worry about." 

He nodded, feeling slightly better. Then he remembered the events that had just occurred, and that feeling went away as soon as it began. He sighed, exhausted, and sat on the couch. His mom sat beside him, putting her arm around his shoulders. 

He wanted to talk about everything, to lift everything off his chest. But he knew that would only make it worse, only make things more stressful and real. 

Instead, he asked, "So. Who's this guy you have a date with?" 

She gave him a bewildered look. Then blinked. "Oh. Well. His name is, um, Eric. He's an old friend of mine. We've known each other since college," she said. "We've been keeping in touch since then. And I ran into him the other day, and . . . things just sort of happened." 

He smiled at her. "I'm happy for you," he said, surprised at the way how easily the words came out. But it was the truth. 

She looked surprised again, then pulled him into another embrace. "Thank you, Aidan. That means a lot to me." 

He smiled, contented to know that even amidst hard times such as these, there was always a little hope, a little light in the darkness. 

• • •

a/n: just a heads up - this story is more of a novella than an actual novel (it was always meant to be that way), meaning it won't consist of more than twenty chapters - maybe even less? so yeah, just an fyi. also i'm halfway through the next chapter so u can expect a faster update (i hope). 

anyway, thanks for reading!