[complexion] ⇒ [devin gordon] [✓]

e i g h t

There's a few more chapters until the whole book is over.

"by different shades of faces then wit told me, "you're womanless, woman love the creation"

DAD ALWAYS TOLD ME boys were pigs and only wanted females body parts and faces. I always questioned him on that but he told me he should know because he was one himself.

I could never see my father trying to play my mother, he had too much love for that women and besides she was kinda crazy, she'd probably hit him upside his head or maybe worse if he ever tried that with shit with her.

But now I understand what he means, boys pick and choose girls by they're shape or how pretty they're face is, not by they're personality or they're brains or what they have to offer.

I might not have the best looking face or the biggest boobs and I sure don't have the biggest ass but I do have a brain and I know how to use it. But I wish my heart and brain were on the same page because this shit hurts.

I told myself I would never fall in love because it can make you do crazy things but I guess nobody has a choice in this, you just randomly find a person and boom you're in love.

It's like Cupid goes around flying around with his bow and arrow shooting everyone, I wish that he would stop.

I just want to know why Devin led me on, if he didn't like or want me why did he kiss me? I could feel my sadness turn into anger I walked up to the mirror and stared at myself for a long time.

I raised my fist and punched the mirror watching it shatter before me, I started to breathe heavily has blood dripped from my hand but I didn't care. Tears were running down my cheeks.

"Ariella!" Mom yelled as she rushed towards me pushing me away from the glass, making my sit on the ground. "Look at your hand, oh my god. What were you thinking?"

I glanced down at my hand and saw a bunch of cuts, but it didn't hurt all I felt was numbness everywhere. That's better than feeling pain. I felt her wrap something around it causing me to look up at her weakly.

"Why did you punch the mirror?"

"Why can't I be light skinned ." I croaked out. She looked at me sadly then no emotions showed at all.

"Don't speak like that."

"It's your fault! Nobody wants a dark skinned girl especially when she's black as coal! I'm not the right shape, I'm not the right color." I screamed in her face, she sat down and took my into her arms as I sobbed into her chest.

I knew it wasn't her fault but I needed to let my anger go.

"You're not ugly and you are the right shape and you are NOT dark as coal and even if you were you'd still be beautiful. Whoever told you that needs a god damn slap to knock some sense back into them. Why do you want to be lighter you're perfect babygirl, what has you thinking like this?"

"Devin choose a light skinned girl over me, obviously I'm not the right color. He drops to his knees for her but won't even look at me. Why does this hurt so bad?"

"You're in love baby, it's going to hurt. And if Devin can't realized you're perfect the way you are then he's not the one for you. He better stop playing with my baby's heart or all hells about to break loose."

I wipe my tears away and smile slightly looking up at my mom. I love her so much.