In eight grade everybody began dating and Ashton talked to me for the first time in four years. I was walking to my locker at the end of the day and he swings around the corner and puts his arm around me ignoring my glare. "Hey kitty!" He said. I shuddered at the old workout nickname given to me in third grade because of my love of cats. I literally had five cat sweatshirts. "What do you want Ashton?" "Call me Ash, and I just wanted to talk to you we haven't spoken in a long time!" I rolled my eyes and shook his hand off my shoulder as I got to my locker. "You haven't even looked at me since fourth grade. That's four years Ashton. What do you want?" A look of surprise crossed over his face, every girl wanted him and he wasn't used to rejection. It was a blessing to even be looked at by Ashton Irwin. He clearly couldn't handle it. "We'll I'm so sorry I want to make our relationship work, kitty." He said. "What relationship? You've changed so much Ashton. Where's my bestfriend? Wheres the boy who would defend me with his life if anyone looked at me wrong? Where's the boy with the floppy curly hair and dimples? I never see them anymore. I never see you smile. And don't call me kitty. You've lost that right." I spat. Before he could reply I turned and walked off, pushing through the crowd of people that had gathered. Typical. The king ALWAYS had his servants ready to grovel at his feet.
My mom was waiting outside and I put on a fake smile. "How was school honey?" She asked "great mom. Mr. Tod gave way to much homework again haha." She smiled at me and I stared out of the passenger seat window. When we got home I ran up to my room and cried. The tears streaked my face and I let them. For the first time in a while. Once I was done I did my homework and checked my twitter. I didn't eat again that night and fell asleep before changing into my pyjamas.
The next day I woke up and took a shower and went to school. Every body was whispering about me. I could tell. One of my closer friends came up to me "did you really slap Ashton Irwin in the face? Did he really call you a slag?" I rolled my eyes and shifted my backpack on my shoulder. "No" I found my way to my locker and turned the dial quickly "9-27-4" I whispered to myself. It popped open and I put my maths and literature books in, taking out my science and social skills out. "Then what happened?" Kayla asked. I ignored her and walked into Mr. Lee's science room. "See you later Kayla." I said.
The rest of the day flew by but I dreaded maths. The only class I had with Ashton. But also the last class of the day. I say down at the back of the class in the right corner so It was hard to see me. But Ash knew exactly where I was and sat down beside me. I closed my eyes for a brief moment in annoyance "what was that yesterday, kitty?" "Goddamnit my name is not kitty! It's lauren! And that was me not putting up with the shit that you dump on everybody else. I see it Ashton. I see you with those girls and how you act with them and I won't let you treat me like that. I may hate myself but I won't let some prick push me around just because he thinks that we're still friends after four years of silence. So do me a favor and leave me alone. Go sit with your doushebag friends and fake smile an straighten your hair. But always remember that I know the real you. You never stopped being my Ash. I see it behind your eyes. The sadness and the pain and the rage and the fear. Remember that." My lip was quivering and I could feel the burning sensation behind my eyes. This idiot has made me cry twice in two days. "Lauren, I'm sorry. I don't know how to make it up to you. But I miss you. And I know I've been awful and I know I've hurt you, and I don't know these people. I don't want to know them. But I saw you, shutting down. It started last year. You started hurting yourself. In more ways then one. And I know it's because no one was there for you. And I couldn't be that person because it hurt to bad to be around you. In fourth grade when I stopped talking to you, it was because boys didnt hang out with girls. And in fifth grade I thought you hated me. And in sixth grade I saw the dirty looks. And in seventh grade, I saw you shut down. I couldn't handle it. I couldn't handle seeing you like that so i pretended not to see you. I pretended not to see the scars on your arms. I pretended not to see you push away your food. I pretended not to see you run into the bathroom after every morsel you ate. It was the hardest thing for me. Seeing my beautiful best friend hurt herself because of other people's opinions. I've been fake for so long and people don't understand how much it hurts because they think that we're too young to understand pain, lauren. But we do. We really do. And I might not understand exactly what you're going through but all I know is that I want to be there to learn and to help you. " it was five minutes until class actually started. Only us and a couple of other people. The tears had stopped and I sat there shocked. He had seen it. He saw it. He was the only one. Class stared and he held out his hand. I grabbed it and didnt let go until the end of class.
