Inevitable

Forgiven But Never Forgotten

I woke up with a feeling of emptiness and soon realized why. I was alone. Carl had left, and I was just lying on my couch alone.

I yawned, stretching as I stared out the window. The sun had just risen into the sky, so it was early in the day. I wasn't sure what I'd resolved the previous night, but I had a feeling I didn't have to worry about Carl hating me anymore.

I went to the kitchen to have breakfast - a granola bar - and found a jar of honey sitting on the counter. I stared at it as if it someone would appear next to it, but of course, I was disappointed to see the jar sit still, alone.

I picked up the jar and noticed a note stuck to the bottom. I pulled off the paper, set the jar in a cupboard, and looked at the note.

Thank you, Ron. ~Carl

That's what it said. That's all it said. I was hoping for more, for at least more effort of thanks than just a thank you and a jar of honey. But then again, I hadn't even expected that.

I went up to the bathroom, yawning as I undressed and stepped into the shower. I felt warm inside from the talk Carl and I had the night before. We didn't resolve much, but at least I knew he didn't hate me which was why I felt so content.

After showering and dressing in a pair of worn out jeans and a grey sweatshirt, I went outside for some fresh air.

The day had just begun. I didn't know what to do since I was sort of useless here. I never knew what was going on half the time because no one seemed to think it was important to tell me if we were all about to die. Of course, I wouldn't be invited to help the group if they went out to kill someone.

I went over to the infirmary to see if Denise was there. Nope. There was no sign of her, and I really wanted to talk to her about something. About Carl.

I decided to check how Carl was doing. I couldn't tell exactly where we stood with what happened last night, but if I talked it over with him, maybe I could figure it out.

I knocked on the door of the Grimes' house, my feet shuffling as I waited. The door opened soon after.

"Ron..." Carl stared at me from under his sheriff's hat. He held Judith in his arms, bouncing her up and down slightly.

"Hey, Carl," I said. "Thanks for the honey."

He raised an eyebrow. "Oh, yeah. No problem."

We stood staring at each other for a minute, silent.

Finally, Carl let out a huff of air and jerked his thumb over his shoulder in the direction of the hallway. "Have time to come in?"

I nodded, stepping through the doorway and past Carl. He shut the door and led me down the hall to the kitchen.

"Any idea where Denise is?" I asked as we took seats next to each other at the table in the kitchen.

Carl shook his head while Judith let out a squeal. He grabbed a bottle from the center of the table and have it to Judith. "I think I saw Daryll and Rosita go with her somewhere," he said.

"Where?" I asked.

"How would I know?"

I bit my lip, shuffling my feet on the floor as I watched Carl. He kept his eyes on Judith.

"Do you still hate me?" I waited as his expression changed, his eyebrow narrowing and his nose scrunching up.

He looked up, finally peeling his eyes away from Judith, and stared at me. "I never really hated you. I just couldn't forgive you."

"Have you forgiven me now?"

He shrugged. "I haven't decided."

Judith began to whimper in Carl's arms. I stood up, figuring that I should leave, but Carl shook his head at me.

He got to his feet with Judith in his arms. "I'll put her in her crib. She just needs some sleep." He walked across the room, then before going through the doorway, he called over his shoulder, "Stay there, Ron."

I did as I was told and stayed where I was, waiting for Carl to get back. I didn't like waiting like this; I wanted answers now.

After about ten minutes, Carl came trotting through the doorway, smirking at me. His sudden change of attitude concerned me.

"What happened to you?" I asked as he plopped down on the floor by my feet instead of the chair.

He shrugged, half smiling. "I figured something out while I was putting Judith to sleep. Something about this whole situation."

I raised an eyebrow, unsure of what he meant. "Figured what out?"

"Figured out why I should stop being stupid and forgive you."

Forgive me? Now I hadn't expected that. Of all the things that could've come out of his mouth, those words were the least expected. At least, to me they were. Honestly, I expected him to take a while to forgive me.

"Ron," Carl said, motioning his hand for me to sit with him.

I hesitated, but found myself seated next to Carl, our shoulders and thighs pressed against each other. I hadn't meant to plop myself down so close to him; it just sort of happened. At least he didn't seem bothered by it.

"Look, Ron," Carl began, staring straight into my eyes. "I understand why you did it. It was an accident. I get that now. But yeah, you also shouldn't have pulled that gun on my dad. I don't care anymore that you shot my eye out; I just care that you understand what I'm telling you."

What he's telling me? Was I missing something?

Carl - seeing my confused expression - said, "I've forgiven you, Ron, but I'll never forget what happened. I don't care if you want to be my friend any more, but I do care whether or not we can survive together. This is the end of the world, for goodness sake! If we can't get over this... mistake of yours, then what's the point?"

He'd forgiven me... he'd really forgiven me! I didn't think he'd do it so fast. I mean, I had shot his eye out. But this was wonderful. We could finally be what I'd wanted us to be the first time I'd layed eyes on him. Friends.

"Ron?" Carl raised an eyebrow at me. I realized I'd been staring silently at him for the last minute.

"Oh, yeah, sorry," I said. "Thanks, Carl. Thank you for giving me a second chance."

He shrugged, his shoulder ruffling against mine. "We have all the time in the world. No reason why I shouldn't give you a second chance."

He turned his head, staring directly into my eyes. I watched him closely, my stomach fluttering slightly. Why was I suddenly so nervous?

"We - well," Carl coughed out, turning to look at the floor quickly. He cleared his throat and stood up, brushing against me. I stood, too.

"You should go," he said, walking down the hall to the front door.

I followed him to the door as he opened it. "I'll see you soon, won't I?"

He smirked, setting his hand on my shoulder. "Of course. Nowhere to really escape to now is there?"

"Yeah, true." The feeling of his hand on my shoulder made my stomach twist tighter.

Carl glanced at his hand before quickly pulling it back to his side. "Alright, see you soon, Ron."

"Bye, Carl." I turned and shuffled out the door, hearing a whisper from behind me. I halted. "What'd you say, Carl?"

"Oh, um... I just said it's a beautiful day today."

"Yeah, it is."