‘What am I living for?’
Joseph found himself asking this question far too often. He’d often wonder what would happen if he just disappeared. Whether people would notice his absence. He doubted it. He really doubted it.
He had come to the conclusion that he wasn’t living for anything. Only living in hope that he would find something to live for before the world sucked him completely void of all feelings, of all emotions.
He was over half-way there. He was numb most of the time. But numb was fine. It wasn’t negative. It wasn’t positive. It was just numb.
He liked it as much as someone can, who can hardly feel anything at all. So he was numb. Which was perfectly alright with him.
But you see the thing is, it wasn’t all alright with Joseph. He missed feeling. He missed screaming out in frustration. He missed breaking down from too much emotion. He missed the pain of heartache. The pain of a throbbing fist. The adrenaline of love. The freedom of losing control.
Before this numbness consumed him he had experienced one supposed love. But he didn’t believe that is was true. He even doubted that it existed. He didn’t even think that it was proper love at the time. But sometimes he would wonder whether it was all a dream, because it was the only remotely pleasant thing that had ever happened to him. It was surreal. But as euphoric as it was he didn’t miss her. He didn’t miss Ana. He did at first, but now it’s just the happiness he felt that he missed. The optimism he felt. The emotions he felt. That’s what he missed.
The memories of her, is what he missed. But not her. Never her. Because if he missed her, he wouldn’t feel numb.
So Joseph passed along in his boringly numb life by reading comics and sci fi books whilst cursing the world and all it’s ever brought him.
Until Rain came.
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A/N- Well this is a new short story that I’m writing. And updates should be frequent. And I hope you guys like it. So drop a comment and let me know what you think.
And this is dedicated to that0fnaught for making the beautiful cover and for just being a brilliant friend. Thanks.
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The Smell of Rain
RomanceJoseph Grint was stuck in the now. Wasting away his days with comic books and Sci fi novels, hoping above all else for something to happen. Anything to happen. Anything to take him away from the numbness that consumed him. But when this something ha...
