A Suicidal Bucketlist

Chapter 2: Am I that Clumsy?

Chapter 2: Am I that Clumsy?

Blaze's P.O.V.

I wake up to be surrounded by tear-stained tissues and me on the couch. I look around and my eyes land on the T.V. Suddenly everything comes back to me. "My parents are dead." I squeal while jumping up and down. I stop mid-jump and realize my parents were all I had. The only people I had in this world were gone. I sit down slowly and feel tears running down my cheeks. I start sobbing. "How am I supposed to live now?" I have no one to take care of me, I'm all alone in this big world.

I sob for a few more minutes then realize, I don't have to be all alone. I hurriedly make my way to the kitchen and open the drawer. The knives were staring at me, egging me on to just grab one and stab myself. But, I had to do this the right way. I grabbed a knife and headed to the closet. I grabbed my book from the top shelf.

I looked at the knife and the bucketlist heavily weighing my options. If I choose to do my bucketlist I could make so many memories. I smile already thinking about it. I turn my head to look at the knife, or I could just end it all right now. I raise the knife up slowly to my heart. I breathe in and out slowly, everything seems to be going in slow motion. The clocks ticking, the sound of the washer, and the thump of the elevator. I slowly stab the knife into my skin, just enough to punctuate it. One drop of blood falls onto the white carpet below me, and... I drop the knife.

I can't do it. I just can't, not right now, not yet. I really want to do it but "Oh!" I splutter, looking at my book. " I swear I'm so dumb sometimes!" I think while, slapping my forehead. Why don't I do my bucketlist? I'm 17 anyways. I think I can do it. "I have no legal guardians anymore!" I think, grinning evilly.

First things first, I gotta get out of here. I run to my parents room and crinkle my nose in disgust. I've never been in here before. I take my first step into the room slowly, bracing myself in case a monster decides to jump out and scare me. I chuckle at my thoughts and step into the room. I really examine the room, because I'm never coming back here. After the examination, I look through all the drawers and grab what I might need.

I pack a few more things into my bag and sit down on the couch. I had realized I hadn't even checked it! I open the book and it read.

My Bucketllist

- move to ny

- change my appearance

- find a job

- have a best friend

- roadtrip

Not bothering to read the rest, I looked up with a smile on my face, "Lets's get started!" I walk out our apartment building and feel like a free woman. I head to the nearest airport which with my luck was an hour away. I sigh, fix my hair and start walking.

15 minutes later I down on the edge of the road and catch my breath. I groan loudly not knowing it would be this tiring to walk. I lean back till I'm laying on the ground, and stare up to the sky wondering if my mom and dad are up there. I smile, "Mom, Dad, if you're up there I just wanted to let you know that..." I smile even wider. "That I hate you and hope you're in hell right now!" I scream at the sky. I get up and toss my bag over my shoulder, realizing I have to get up sometime. I hear a sudden honk and turn around.

"Luke!" I shout suddenly.

"Hey, B. Need a ride somewhere?"

"Yea," I replied already hopping in the car.