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I've never had an easy life. For majority of my existence, my brother and mum weren't on speaking terms because of some of his life choices and I constantly had to be the middle man between the two. I never knew my father and I didn't care to. What was the point in wanting to find a man who didn't want you? I've never lived in one place for very long. The longest so far was three years with my current roommates, but I was sure I would be packing soon. To say my life was complicated was an understatement.
However, none of this compared to the most complicated part of my life. And his name was Ashton Irwin.
"Hey y/n?" One of my roommates called out.
"Bedroom!" I yelled.
Alice's head popped through the door way.
"Whatch up to?" I sat my paint brush on my easel and stood to the side to show her the current project I was working on. She stepped closer to examine the painting.
"School work or commissions?" She asked.
"Commissions. I got an email last week." I picked up my paint tray and started to add more colours.
"It's very... interesting." The painting was more than interesting. It was suppose to be a very dark painting. All that was requested was that it be twisted.
I laughed. "Yeah the guy's request was a bit weird, but money is money!"
Alice smiled. "Amen to that!"
I picked up my brush and went back to work. "So what did you need?"
"Oh I came in to tell you that Bree is throwing a party tonight." She said.
I smiled. "That will be fun. We haven't had a party in ages!"
"Mhm." Was all she said while fiddling with one of my paint tubes. There was something else that she wasn't telling me.
"What is it?"
She bit her lip in hesitation. "Jess invited Ashton."
My brush stopped moving. Slowly, I turned around to face her. Alice was watching me carefully. Like I was a bomb and she was waiting for me to explode.
I shrugged. "Okay."
She gave me a look. "Okay?"
I nodded. "Okay."
"Okay?" She repeated.
"Stop with the okays. We're not Gus and Hazel!" I laughed as I turned back the painting.
Alice turned my chair back. "Did you not hear me? I said Jess invited Ashton."
"And I said okay. I thought we just went thought this." I smirked.
"Y/n-"
I put my hand up. "Look Alice, I really appreciate your concern, but it's alright. Everything will be fine."
She crossed her arms. "Do you honestly believe that?"
I shook my head. "No not one bit, but what do you want me to do?"
She threw her hands up in frustration. "Tell her she can't invite him!"
I gave her a look before turning back around. "I'm can't tell her not to invite her brother."
"So what are you going to do? Avoid him the whole night?"
"I'm going to try to, but I know that at some point I will have to talk to him." I shrugged. "And when that time comes, I'll do my best to get out of it."
I felt a hand on my shoulder. I looked up and saw Alice giving me a small smile. "We don't have to go you know? We can go out. Watch a movie maybe?"
I smiled, but shook my head. "Bree would murderer us if we missed a party. Besides, it's time I be a big girl about this."
"You're too good for him."
That's all she said before she left. The thing was she was wrong. I wasn't good enough for him. I wasn't even good enough for myself
—
Everyone in the house was out doing party related things. Bree was out getting food, Alice was getting the drinks, and Jess... I wasn't too sure what Jess was doing. Meanwhile, I was at home cleaning. I didn't mind doing the cleaning. At least I knew that it would happen if i did it. There was no guarantee that any of the others would do it if the task was bestowed upon them.
Fine By Me by Andy Grammer was blasting throughout the house. Dancing and singing while cleaning made everything seem faster. Plus it was the only time I could actually dance like a dork without being ridiculed by my roommates.
I was just about to belt out the chorus when I heard someone laughing in the doorway. A laugh I knew all too well. I turned around slowly and saw that my suspicions were correct. Standing in the doorway was Ashton Irwin.
"What are you doing here?" I asked.
"What?" He yelled over the loud music.
I turned off the music. "I asked what are you doing here?"
He smiled. "Jess sent me. She said you might need help cleaning."
Why Jess? Why!
"I don't need your help. I'm already done." I said as I walked passed him.
He snaked his hands around my waist and whispered in my ear. "Great, then we have time."
I shoved him off me. "Watch yourself Irwin. I'm not opposed to castrating you."
He stepped closer, backing me into the wall. "But then what would you have to play with?"
He was very close. I could feel his breath on my lips. I glared at him and attempted to push him again, but he grabbed my wrist. "Let go."
"Make me Princess." He smirked, using that stupid nickname.
He wanted to play games? I could play games. I leaned down to bite his neck while my hips rubbed against his cock. His eyes fluttered closed and his grip on my wrist loosened. Before he even realized it I slipped out of his grip, ran off to my room, and locked the door behind me.
I grabbed my phone and Immediately called Alice.
"Hello?"
"Alice where are you?" I asked urgently.
"On the way home. Why? Whats wrong?"
I bit my lip. "Ashton is here."
There was a moment of silence on the other line.
"Alice?"
"Shit sorry! I'm driving as fast as I can. Don't worry, I'll be there soon. Just stay in your room."
"Okay just hurry."
"I am. I'll see you when I get there." Then the line went dead.
I threw the phone on the bed and paced around my room. I took deep calming breaths, but it didn't seem to work. The only way I was going to be able to calm down was if he left. I fell face down onto my bed.
"God why did I have to fucking sleep with him!" I groaned into my pillow.
There was nothing in this world that I regretted more than having sex with Ashton. If I had stayed away from him than my life would have been easier. But of course I just loved complicated things. And my relationship with Ashton was nothing but complicated.
There was a soft knock on my door causing my breath to hitch.
"Y/n?" It was Alice.
Relief flooded over me. I quickly opened the door and pulled her into the room. "What's he doing now?"
"Watching t.v." She sat on the bed. "What happened?"
I sat next to her and pulled my legs against my chest. "He tried something again."
Alice sighed. "Can't he take a hint?"
Alice was the only person who knew I had slept with Ashton. Out of all my roommates she was the one I was closest to. Bree and Jess were very nice and there were times I enjoyed their company. They just weren't the best people to turn to when you needed a friend.
"Come one. We have to get ready for the party." She got up from the bed and went to my closet.
"What are you doing?"
"Picking out your outfit for tonight." She turned to me and smirked. "We're going to make him pay for ever hurting you."
—
"I'm not so sure about this Alice."
"Will you relax! You look hot!" She said while she straightened my hair.
Alice decided that my outfit for the night would be a black dress I hadn't worn in years. I was still surprised it fit after all this time! She was gracious enough to allow me to wear my usual converse instead of heels. give me flat shoes any day, but heels were just not my thing.
Knock knock
"Come in!" Alice yelled.
It was Bree who walked in. "Damn y/n! You look hot!"
Alice beamed. "Doesn't she?"
"Yeah yeah! I look great! Can we move on please" I pushed.
"Okay Ms. Cranky Pants." Bree laughed. "Anyways, people are starting to arrive. So stop playing dress up and come join everyone!"
"We'll be out in a minute! I'm just adding the finishing touches."
"Don't take too long!" Bree said as she walked out and closed the door behind her.
After a minute or two, Alice was finally done. She looked at me up and down and smiled. "You look amazing!"
I took a long look at the mirror. I felt like the girl I was staring at was some stranger. A girl I could never be, but so desperately wanted to.
"Alice... I'm nervous."
She placed a hand on my shoulder. "It's going to be alright. I promise."
With a small smile she walked out of my room. I took a deep breath before following her out. There were a good handful of people already here, but I knew there would be more coming. Our parties tended to get out of hand sometimes.
I recognized a few people and said my hellos. After an hour i was bored. Alice was no where to be found. She was most likely hooking up with some guy. I found Bree and Jess, chatting up two frat boys. I made my way over to them.
"Y/n! Come meet Josh and Alex!" Bree squealed.
I said an awkward hello which the two returned. It was obvious that Bree and Jess were their intended targets so in quickly left them be. I decided that then was the best time to get a drink. I grabbed a bottle of vodka and started pouring it into a cup.
"You look beautiful Princess."
It didn't even take me a fraction of a second to realize it was Ashton. I turned away from the bar to see that smug face of his an inch away from mine.
"What do you want?" I hissed.
His eyebrows furrowed. "I wanna talk."
"So talk." I took a sip of the vodka.
He shook his head. "I wanna talk in private."
I scoffed at his request.
"Please?" He begged.
With a sigh of defeat, I grabbed the vodka bottle and made my way back to my room with Ashton following behind me. I sat on my bed and watched as Ashton closed the door. Memories of the time we slept together flooded back and I took a long swig from the bottle.
Ashton started walking around my room, observing everything. He stopped in front of the painting I was working on. "I really love your artwork. How you paint is so beautiful."
"Is that what you wanted to talk about? My work?"
He shook his head.
"Well then could you get to it so I can go back to the party?" I asked impatiently.
He glared at me and shiver went down my spine. I took another sip of vodka.
"Why have you been avoiding me?" He asked.
I was taken back by his question. "Are you serious? That's what you wanted to talk about?"
Ashton simply stared at me. I felt angry. How could he ask me why I was avoiding him. I got up from the bed and made my way to the door, but was stopped by Ashton.
"Where are you going?" He asked as grabbed my arm
I pulled away. "Back to the party."
He grabbed my arm again and pulled me close. "You're not going anywhere until you answer my question."
"You know why I'm avoiding you!" I hissed.
"Because we had sex? Jesus Christ y/n, you could have said no!"
"Not because we had sex!"
"Then what? Please enlightenment me on what it was that has you treating me as if I were the plague." He yelled in frustration.
"You left!" I yelled back.
His grip loosened and his gaze softened. "What?"
I pulled out of his grip and turned away from him.
"You're avoiding me because I wasn't there the next morning?" He asked.
I didn't say anything. My silence was my answer.
"I left because I thought that's what you wanted." He said softly.
"What would make you think that?" I asked as I turned back.
"You're kidding right?" I shook my head and he ran a hand through his hair. "Every time I would come over I would always hear about some guy you had slept with and how you would leave before daylight. You always seem to take pride with the fact that you had no emotional attachments to anyone."
He moved closer to me and I looked down. "I knew I shouldn't have slept with you because you are so extremely complicated. But I just couldn't take it. From the moment I met you I was drawn to you. I know how cheesy that sounds and believe me I hate it, but it's true. I wanted you and I know what happened between us was my fault."
"I wanted you too though." I whispered. "I actually had feelings for you."
Ashton lifted my Chin. "Do you still have those feelings?"
My stomach felt like butterflies with the way he looked at me. I could feel my knees growing week and my heart beating rapidly throughout my body.
"No." I whispered.
"Liar." Was all he said before his lips collided with mine. They were just as soft as the last time. My hands found their way into his hair and pulled slightly. He gasped and I took my chance to deepen the kiss. I could taste the mix of alcohol on his tongue.
Ashton moved us back until i felt the bed hit the back of my knees. He pushed me on the bed while falling on top of me, using his elbows to prop him up. The entire time our mouths didn't break apart. It wasn't until he kissed down my neck that our kiss ended. I bit my lip as he left marks up and down my neck. He knew my neck was my greatest weakness.
"Ash..." I moaned softly.
He started kissing down my clothed chest. Ashton slid off the bed to remove my shoes.
"You know I think you're doing it backwards. Prince Charming put the shoe ON Cinderella's foot. Not the other way around." I smirked.
He smiled and yanked me closer to the edge of the bed. "Yeah well he hadn't slept with Cinderella yet. He had no idea how good she was in bed. If he had, he would definitely not be putting that shoe one her."
With a wink he pushed up my dress and kissed my clit through my underwear, causing my hips jerked up involuntarily. Ashton used an arm to keep my hips down while slowly taking off my underwear. Once they were off he didn't even bother teasing me. His mouth started to suck on my clit and my head fell back on the bed.
"Jesus fucking Christ." I moaned loudly.
"Actually it's Ashton." He smirked.
I rolled my eyes. "Haha very funny."
"I'm so glad you find me amusing Princess." He said before going back to his work.
My hands were intertwined with his hair. Each swipe of his tongue was sending me closer and closer to my peak. It was hard to keep still at that point and he had to use both arms to pin me down.
"Ashton!" I screamed as I came.
He kissed my clit softly before climbing on top of me. He gave me a hard bite on my neck causing me to yelp. Ashton soothed it over with his tongue sending shivers down my spine. His lips kissed my jaw before finally reaching my lips.
I tugged at the bottom of his shirt and pulled it off. I raked my hands over his chest as I rolled my hips against his. His head fell on my chest and he moaned into my ear.
I flipped us over to where I was straddling him and grinded on him. His grip on my hips tightened. I watched as his head fell back and his eyes squeezed shut. He looked so perfect. I was a moaning mess from the friction between of my clit against his jeans.
Ashton sat up and pulled down the zipper of my dress as I fumbled to undo his jeans. He pushed me off so we both could rid ourselves of our clothes.
Once the two of us were completely naked, he warped his arms around my waist and pushed me softly onto the bed. I reached over to grab a condom from by drawer, but Ashton beat me to it.
"I remember where they are Princess." He winked and tore the foil with his teeth.
"Stop showing off Irwin." I teased.
He smirked while rolling the condom onto his cock. "Well I gotta impress my Princess."
"Your Princess?" I questioned.
"Well... I was kinda hoping." His confidence from earlier faltered.
I bit my lip and nodded. "Yeah I'd like that."
He smiled brightly before kissing me sweetly. Without warning, he slowly slid his penis inside me causing my back to arch. He groaned into my ear and my nails dug into his back. His hips started moving slowly and I could feel myself losing control.
I dragged my hands down his back signalling him to move faster. His thrusts were faster, but not as fast as I wanted. He bit down my neck while also palming one of my breasts.
Neither of us were talkers when we had sex. Our moans were enough to let us know how close we were to the edge. And by the way he was grunting, he was pretty damn close.
His thrusts became much faster and erratic. The hand that was palming my breast moved down onto my clit. His movements against it matched his thrusts and that was all I needed. The two of us came together screaming each other's name.
Ashton tiredly collapsed onto my chest and I ran my hands through his hair.
"Tired?" I asked. He nodded and I giggled. "Come on."
I slightly pushed him off so he was laying on his back. My head fell into place on his chest and he wrapped both arms around me. It didn't take very long for the two of us to fall asleep.
The next morning I woke up still tangled in his arms and I couldn't help, but smile. My relationship with Ashton was no longer complicated. And that made me very happy.
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