Heartbeat

Chapter 3

Max and I have been texting each other every day and every night, trying to get to know each other as much as possible. My mother already knows about Max and she doesn't mind at all. She just said that it is okay as long as it doesn't affect our studies. She, of course, asks me updates with me and Max. She asks me every night. I'm starting to get sick of it, actually. But she is a mom, that's what they do. I'm just glad that mom doesn't overreact about it.

I'm sitting in front of our law professor while she teaches. It's a good thing that she rarely walks around the room and she just sits on her desk while lecturing. It is so boring and most of us are using our cell phones. I'm sitting in the second row but the person in front of me is absent, so I'm basically in front of our professor. I hide my cell phone in between my notebook and to the chair in front of me.

Max: Hello :)

So yeah, we're texting even in law class. We're texting each other every minute. I start to type in my reply when I feel someone is looking at my cell phone. It's John. We're seatmates. I roll my eyes at him and cover my cell phone while I type.

Me: Hi :)

Max: What you doin'?

Me: I'm in class. You?

Max: Oh. I didn't know. I should text you later. I'm sorry. :(

Me: No no. It's okay. It's boring anyway. :)

John is looking again and I ask him what he wants. He says nothing and brings out his phone to text. I ignore him as I continue texting and constantly glancing at our professor to avoid being caught. I never thought an hour and a half would take so long. Our class has not yet been dismissed. It's just been 30 minutes, Max and I already talked many stuff. So many, we don't have any topics left to talk about. And so, I copy his texts.

Max: Yeaahh hahaha:)

Me: Yeaahh hahaha:)

Max: Stop copying me!

Me: Stop copying me!

Max: Okay then.

Me: Okay then.

"You two are still texting, huh?" John suddenly asks.

"Yeah, so?" I ask him maybe too rudely because his eyes widen. Then he immediately turns to face our professor. I never got an idea what his deal is. I mean, I don't care about his life and he should not care about mine as well, right?

Max: I

Me: I

Max: L

Me: L

Max: O

Me: O

Letters. Nice one, Max. I want to annoy him so I continue to copy his texts.

Max: V

Me: V

Max: E

Me: E

Uhm..

Max: U

Did he just say he loves me? Or was he just playing a game? Either way, I feel so awkward.

Me: Hahaha..

Max: Why did you not copy it anymore?? ;)

Me: I just don't like to. Hahaha

And we're dismissed. Finally.

We don't spend much time together. If we have time, we go for it. But if we don't, better luck next time. I'm starting to think about him all the time. I never thought that I would be doing that. When he confessed to me, all I was thinking is that I am not allowed to be courted until I graduate. Of course, he knows about it. That's why he respects my decision to stay as friends. But with what he is doing for me, it seems like he's already courting me. There was one time where I told him to stop walking me home if he's not really courting me. His facial expression changed, and then he said that he just wants me to arrive home safely. Of course, I said I can handle myself. He did not argue further and let me walk home alone. However, after a few days, he started walking me home again. I told mom about it but she said to just let it go and let him do whatever he wants and so I did.

The thing about me is that I'm kind of afraid of love. I have never fallen in love with anybody yet, but I have heard various stories and most of them did not end well. I'm scared that I will give my all but it is still not enough. I am scared that nobody will love me for who I really am. I am scared that's why I keep my defenses up to protect me. But my mother said, as long as I left some love for myself, I'm good to go. Love is risky. I'm a risk-taker. Game on.

====

"Where are we gonna eat lunch?" Ann asks.

"We'll reserve us seats in the canteen. You guys buy some food upstairs." Max suddenly answers.

Our college organized a business exposition. There are students and also some well-known companies participated. There are a lot of people that we have to reserve a seat, actually. The elevator is packed, so we just use the stairs to the canteen. I walk down fast while he is left behind.

"Slow down, Cara." He walks after me. I slow down a little when I turn for the stairs. Then, Max hugs me from behind. My heart skips a beat and I stop in my tracks. I try to walk again but he doesn't let go. My back is pressed against his chest. It is warm but I actually like it. I slowly tap his arms that are wrapped around my waist, then he lets go. The walk to the canteen is now awkward. None of us even try to start a conversation.

We reach the canteen and I proceed to the table and reserve enough seats for us. I look at Max and he is smiling. His eyes are sparkling with genuine happiness.

"Is it really your first time to hug a girl?" I can't resist to ask. I remember we talked about it the other day. He said he has never hugged a girl, even his exes. Also, he said that he has never even thought of hugging them. It is just me that he wants to hug because he sees his future with me. I thought it was so sudden. It has been just a few months since we met and he confessed. But I'm wrong. Time doesn't matter in liking someone. It is all about the feelings you feel when you're together and time has nothing to do about it. He is the one responsible for it. If you like him, you like him.

"Yes," he smiles. "Is it your first time to be hugged by a guy?"

"Yes, I didn't have a boyfriend ever, remember?" I smirk.

"Of course." He smirks too.