Seeds Of Yesterday

Chapter 1: A Year Later

I tried desperately to forget about Bart but it is kind of hard to forget about someone when the person in question is always around. It seemed that especially lately he was everywhere. My mother finally agreed that I was old enough to date after my 13th birthday. There was a boy at my school that asked me out on my first date.

His name was Alexander, he was so nice and sweet but when he held my hand I didn't feel anything. We went to the movies, it was some sweet comedy, I'm not sure what the title was. To be honest I wasn't paying too much attention to the movie. I kept thinking about his arm around my shoulder and I wondered why I didn't feel anything. It wasn't like when Bart kissed me and the world melted away.

I wanted that feeling back, I wanted to feel that possessed again by someone that I was allowed to love and would love me back. I knew that it could never be between me and Bart. He was just a dream, a fantasy that could never be but Alexander was real and into me. When the date was finally over and we ended up on my front porch but as he leaned into kiss me goodnight; suddenly the front door was opened and Bart stood there just looming over us.

He started screaming at me, "Just what the hell is going on here?"

"Nothing, I was just dropping your sister off after our date."

"Good, then say goodnight and get in the house already."

I had no choice but to comply to his demands at least this time. After I went into the house Bart was following close behind me. When I was finally in my bedroom, I decided to confront him and his bipolar disorder attitude.

"Just what did you think you were doing?"

"What I was doing isn't up for discussion, just what were you doing letting some boy put his hands all over you?"

"I didn't even get to kiss him let alone anything else. As always you interrupted way too soon for anything to happen. Why do you care anyway what I do or who I do it with? Are you jealous or something?"

"What, please of that little boy toy, I don't think so. Besides I don't think he is man enough for you. "

I kept walking further into my bedroom as if I expected him to follow me. It seemed that he was following me into the room. I was expecting him to make some inappropriate comment and then leave but that's not what happened next. He kept walking until he backed me into a wall.

Then he leaned in closer and said softly, "No one will ever make you feel the way that I did. Maybe you should just admit that you still want me and only me."

"Please, like your God's gift or something, you need to get over yourself already. What happened between us is over and it will never happen again."

"I'm not so sure that it was a one-time thing. I know it's wrong but I can't seem to help myself, I'm drawn to you like no other before."

Then he pulled me closer and started kissing me quite passionately. I knew that it was wrong let him continue but I was drawn to him as well. We kissed as if it would be the last time that we touched each other again. It may have went further than a kiss but we quickly turned away from one another after we heard someone coming upstairs.

"This never happened, remember that."

Then he was gone from my room yet again. I knew even in that moment that I needed to stop this but I just couldn't bring myself to push him away. Therefore, almost every time that he came to me, I couldn't turn him away. At first he tried to stay away from me until this wanting seemed to become too much. Then he would come to me and kiss me and I would let him.