The nightmare

Chapter 2

*Junes POV*
- Saturday morning.
     I woke up around 9:30 in the morning, hungry but mowing there's no food. I get out of bed and walk over to my closet to get dressed.. Typical over sized hoodie and skinny jeans. I decide to leave my long blonde hair down today.

     Yesterday was fun reading all of my diaries seeing how my life changed in each one. I wonder what I could do today, usually I'd just lock myself in room all day cause my parents would forget about me or I would go to the park and sit on the swings alone.

     I've been saving up all the money I had to get food, every coin I saw on the streets I'd pick up. So far I had $26.29. I'm pretty proud of myself for getting so much money. I might go to the store today and get a sandwich, I haven't ate in so long.

    I climb out my window, not wanting my parents to hear me go out the front door. I walk myself to a deli, their the cheapest... Buying a sandwich and biting into it.. Best feeling in the world.

   Today is going to be another depressing day, nothing to live for. Nothing to do anyways, what's the point? I go home and just as I reach my house I hear someone call my name. 'Hey June ' they said. I don't look back because nobody would call me.

    I hear it again and again so I turn around. Nobody's there. Confused and stressed I keep walking. I keep hearing these voices in my head, some positive but some negative. I. Don't like it.

  I reach home and climb up my house into my window to see my parents in my room. My mom drags me from the window and starts screaming at me. I don't answer so she slaps me across the face. My dad laughs. I cry.

   She calls me names and tells me to go die; that I have nothing to live for anyways, then she kicks me and leaves my room. Walking over to the mirror to see a red burning hand print on my face.

    I lock my bedroom door again, get my diary and sit down on my bed.   'Came home to a beating, got food. Hearing voices in my head. My mom told me to go die. April 7, 2016'.

    I haven't told you yet but I have a book of plans. Plans of any sort you could think of. How to kill my self, how to escape, running away plans.... Etc. but I'm going to grab my how to kill myself book.

   I grab my black pen and my book and open it. I'll read of my plans.
- hang myself, stab myself, over dose, jump, drown myself, poison myself, and much more. I was going to hang my self but I don't have much money to buy a rope.

     My mom has a lot of pills, I could overdose and plus that's the easiest way to do it... I guess I'll just overdose but I'll have to find a time and a date to do it...

    It's already 3pm; my parents are gone, the probably went to the bar to get drunk like always. I unlock my phone and go on wattpad. I want to get my mind off things and read or write a book.

    I'm gonna write a book about myself and my life, I'll call it the nightmare...  Cause let's face it, my life is a living nightmare.

    After I was done with wattpad I decided to just relax so I laid in my bed and looked at my roof. All of a sudden I started hearing voices in my head. It was like they were trying to get me to wake up. Who are these people ?

The people in my head kept saying to open my eyes and that they are going to be there for me, if they say that then why doesn't it happen?

These people in my head didn't happen often at first but it kept getting more common for it to happen on a daily basis. But one of those people talking in my head caught my attention. It was a boy and he kept telling me he loved me and that I could get through it and everything will be okay if he was there with me.

All I am is confused and I just want it all to stop, maybe if I take a nap everything will be better... I hope.

I wake up and it's midnight, the house is quiet... I think my parents are still at the bar, there's school soon and I'm going to have to get up and go to school for another day of getting bullied.

I sit in my bed crying, thinking about life and how it's going. All the diaries I read... It seemed like my childhood was great but to be honest, I don't remember much. It's like I didn't even live my childhood, like I wasn't their to live it.

I started to think, trying to think about my child hood.. I just couldn't remember anything. The only reason I remember a little of my childhood is cause my diaries but.... I don't feel like I lived it.

I remember living my sophomore year and this year, my junior year but now that I think about it... I don't remember anything except for 10th and 11th grade.

I'm going to stop thinking and try to go back to sleep... It's been a rough rough day.
- goodnight