One Last Time K?

Late at night

Trust me I normally don't stay up all night but technically that all depends on who you ask. Lately I've stayed up late a lot. Kinda just focused on other things than sleep. You know like listening to All Time Low on my laptop, playing video games, eating cereal in bed, etc. The normal things everyone does. No? Just me? Yeah I figured...yeah I know why I'm staying up... because I've never felt so alone. Nobody's here with me to love me and just stay. Writing is the only escape to this crappy life I've begun to lead. I just keep telling myself it'll be okay. It always gets better. I told my dad that once. He didn't agree with me. Go figure. I've always believed it. I always will. Things never stay bad. They might get worse but eventually time will pass and I'll be just fine. I'm a brave enough guy. Probably because I have to protect everyone but whatever. I can get through this. My friends...I really need them right now. They always know just how to make me feel useful even if I'm not But I don't have them with me. So I have to lie to myself the same way I lie to everyone else. "Are you okay?" Everyone asks. "yeah...I'm fine..." I say. But I'm not am I. I have to lie to keep going. Eh I've lied to myself before. Time for a second round. Wish me luck? Ughhhh I just wish the sweet darkness of sleep would just hurry up and come because I can't handle deep late night thoughts. I want to talk about zombies and gore. You know more cheerful things. Just not tonight I guess.