Abby texted and as it was close to the weekend, I ended up having plans to stay at hers, as usual. I loved going to Abby's.
When I got there I never expected this to happen. We done what we usually do, talk and watch movies. This time she told me something that didn't surprise me much but I couldn't seem to let go. "I don't have feelings for Hannah anymore and I was thinking about braking up with her, she's just too clingy for me." Those words didn't leave me alone, it's not like I was thinking of them all night but after that night, it was all I thought about.
Abby had moved her room around and I liked how it sat, she had her tv in her room so we grabbed some movies from the other room. We went for a "horror" theme as we took 'record' - a Spanish movie that had subtitles that some how I kept up with - it's a really good movie and then we watched, jeepers creepers. I don't need to really say anything, it was just those movies that with my mind, no matter how silly, it would try stop me from sleeping. As I said she moved her room around so there were new, unfamiliar shadows and shapes, I started to picture creatures in the room and I don't do well with that.
Somehow I fell asleep and that dream, it changed my thinking, I couldn't think straight. If I hadn't been around Abby, I wouldn't be actin normal, well normal isn't the right word but I wouldn't be acting like myself.
Maybe I should explain the dream, and why Abby's words didn't leave my mind.
~le dream~
I was walking through a town quite close by school, and I was basically acting couple-like with Hannah, and when I turned round, looking over my shoulder, I saw Abby, she looked bitter. We then just trailed off in a group, me holding Hannah's hand.
~
The dream just trailed off by then, that's why I can't stop my head going crazy, the scene playing over and over. I had seen how Abby and her were and I really liked that, and she is one of my best friends.
I just thought about being with her, but when I added that she, well she's a girl, I wasn't sure. I still hadn't figured out if I am...
But maybe this was a clear sign, yes I am bisexual.
And I want to be with Hannah.
But she's with Abby, my other bet friend. Even if their relationship is at its end and it won't last much longer, they are still together.
///\\\
I'm sorry if it seems crushed together and not too detailed- also if it is like a year later, entering into a diary ;)
I just hope you are enjoying it- I've just thought of this for the empty story that seemed to have gone to waist till now.
This may end up reallllly long but it should be worth it!
Kay~<3
