Sweet Addiction (Interracial) || Book 1

- Addiction 12 -

12
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Karma Sundai Iñigo

Three days later...

I should just kill myself because I'm dying anyways.

Once I left the hospital to go home, I did nothing but stay in the bed and watch movies. I couldn't think straight, I couldn't function like I used to.

The tumor in my brain expanded, the rest of the cancer spreading through my body. I lit up like a Christmas tree.

I hated myself for always drinking at my postpartum depression stage. I hated myself for even smoking a few cigarettes when I was in high school. Hated myself for eating too much and getting bigger to slightly cause my diagnosis.

All I wanted was to be happy. I was never, ever happy the way people seem to think I was and am. Never had an actual childhood because they wanted me to mature. Never had the type of family I wanted to have- they forced me into various amounts of things. For example, sex and marriage.

Ran away to move to the United States to live a better and happier life- that never happened. From my life I had in Nigeria, it seemed to get to me. It made me a depressed girl who walked the unknown streets of what I called a free country.

Then I found a friend on a play ground. She had lollipops and a bag of chips, wanting to share it with someone. She picked me. At the ages of 13, we were inseparable. I guess I was happy at some points of my life with Maryland there.

Now, at the age of 22, everything from my past caught up with me. The reality that I thought used to be an okay one, turned out to be messed up.

But not everything was messed up.

He isn't that messed up either.

Somehow, Orlyndo made me happier. He made me feel different and I knew that I couldn't deny it. No matter how many times I rejected him in the beginning, I accepted him anyway.

But sadly, he doesn't feel the same. I'm just a little toy he likes to mess with and keep for himself.

I enjoy being that toy...

"Yes?" I sniffed as I answered my phone

"Open the door"

Ending the call, I got up from the bed. I went to open the door for him and headed back to my room.

I don't know why I love him so much to keep letting him in like this. Like, I'll do anything he says.

"Aren't you supposed to be in New York?" I roughly rubbed my eyes, getting back underneath my blankets

"Yes, but mostly everyone canceled their meetings"

"Could've stayed down there" I said

"Didn't want to"

I scoffed in exhaustion, "What do you want now? You're always popping up at-"

"I'm not going to explain anything. Not right now" He interrupted

I only nodded, not in the mood to talk or argue about it. In all honesty, I wanted his presence in my apartment, but not near me.