Started With Lies

Im Just Gonna Leave Now:Part Three

I just sat there wondering if he was going to just stand there or do something. He still had that anger in his eyes. I backed up wanting to be as far as possible from him in this state. I kept backing up but I bumped into a hard object that happened to be the wall. Just great. He took a step closer. Then another and another. He stopped when we were only centimeters apart. I felt the heat that was radiating from him. I could just imagine the steam coming out of his ears. I giggled immeadiatly regretting it after because he started to become physical. He took his hand and started to pull my hair and with his free hand he closed the door. He turned his head to me and said something under his breath. I'm not sure if he wanted me to hear it but I did. He said" good thing this room has soundproof walls because she will be screaming when I'm done with her." His murmured comment wanted to make me cry tears of sadness mixed with pain because his grip on my hair was really tight. But I didn't because I dind't want him to think I was weak and scared even though I really was. He dragged me to the bed and pushed me down onto it. I tried screaming knowing it was no use. The next thing I knew his fist had made contact with my right cheek. He had punched me. That motherf*cker punched me. I held my hand up to my stinging cheek sheilding it from his hand. I looked at him for a second before I realized that he was unbackling his belt. Was he going to rape me? What was he going to do? He staryed to unzip his pants when I kicked him down there. He held it in shock and pain. I ran to the door and tried to open it but it was locked. I started to bang on the door hoping someone will hear me. I turned to look at him. He was still holding his downstairs area. He had a smirk on his face and I was more scared than ever. He opened his mouth but closed it like he was about to say something. He eventually said" If you don't kick or hit me, I'll try to be gentle with you." My eyes began to water because this was going to be just like when I was kidnapped. Tears came rolling down my cheecks as I remembered how bad it hurt when I got raped by that other guy. Why me? Why does it have to be me? "You're just so beautiful and nobody likes you in this school. I want make you feel special" he said. I'm guessing that he heard my little conversation that he wasn't suppose to hear. More tears came rolling down. He unzipped his pants fully and patted the bed. I didn't have anything to lose right. I lost my mom, my friends, I don't even have my virginity anymore. I walked over to the bed and sat down. I didn't really care anymore. I just wanted to leave this horrible world. I just want to reconnect with my mom in heaven. I just wanted to end everything. He pulled his pants down and he had no underwear on so I saw his thing. It was big and that just made me cry even more. He took off my dress gently then my panties and put them aside. He kept his shirt on and grabbed a condom on the nightstand next to us. He put it on and entered me slowly.

*No sex scene people*

After it was all done we were both sweating. He put my clothes on me for me and then put his clothes on. He walked to the door and unlocked. He just walked out like nothing happened. Like he didn't just rape me. I just wanted to leave this place. I got up and walked downstairs. I went to the door and left. When I got home I started crying into my pillow. I remembered my mom and how I wanted to be with her right now. I got up and went to the bathroom. I was crying so much that my mascara was running down my cheecks. Did I really want to do this? Did I really want to die? I just wanted to live my life in peace. I slid down the bathroom wall and put my head in my legs. I was in the corner crying. Is this really what my life is? Im just another life gettimg in the way if everyone elses. Nobody wanted me. I had nothing to hang onto anymore. I got up feeling weaker than ever. I opened the cabinet door searching for any type of pills. I searched around dropping things, making a mess. I finally found a bottle that had a lable, but it was to blury from all the crying I was doing. I shook it to make sure there was enough. The noise of the pills combined with the noise of the front door signaling that my dad was home. I walked over to the door almost falling trying to lock it. Once I did, I quickly went over to the sink where the pills were. I opened them without any trouble. I poured them all into my hands. I looked up into the mirror to see my puffy red eyes and mascara al over my face. I looked ugly. Who will ever want me. I looked down at the pills in my hands when I heard my dad calling my name." Alexia, Alexia, Alexia." "I love you dad. I'm sorry. I love you" I said through the door. "What do you mean? What are you doing?" I sobbed even more just listening to the sound of his voice. I heard footsteps coming closer. He was running. I dropped the pill bottle as I put 3 pills in my mouth. He started banging on the door. "Open up." I put 3 more in my mouth. He started kicking it. I started feeling dizzy. I was closer than ever to my mom when my dad kicked the door down. I looked down at my hand and put the rest of them in my mouth. It started to get blury, then it went completly dark. Was I dying? Was I already died? Am I in heaven?

Hey
So I know I haven't been updating but as most of you know the state test has been these past two weeks. So I will be updating sooner and more often. Thats it.
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Bye my

Lucky People