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#9 - This is real, not a dream

Hanabi Fukunada POV

And again..

Everything flashed before me for the second time.

My head was spinning after I overheard Shiroyama and Yamato, I couldn't get my head straight which is weird.

"Hey are you alright?" I had only snapped when Mino tapped my shoulder then it was after lunch when I realized I was spacing out that I didn't hear anything about what Mino said. I slapped my own cheeks and smiled in front of her to show that everything's alright.

"You only went after Shiroyama earlier and you came back as if you lost your soul?" Her eyebrow was raised.

"Did I? Your mind might be playing tricks with you." I said. Scratching the back of my head.

"Hanachii~ I'm not that stupid. Don't underestimate my memory." She said locking her eyes into mine but I was avoiding her eye contact and thankfully our next subject teacher appeared right on time. "Well I respect it if it's something you don't want to tell me but tell me if it got too heavy alright? I'm a good listener." She said as she went back to her seat.

"Sure thing.." My face was getting tired of smiling.

I didn't even pay attention to our class. What happened of aiming to become a student of the year? There's a lot of things in my mind right now that I don't know what to think. Especially after hearing what Aoi Shiroyama said, me... An orphan? I don't want to believe that.

As time pass by it seemed as if I only waited for the class to end, I didn't remember anything from our lessons today. I know Mino should have noticed that by now but I don't want her to think I'm keeping things from her as a friend.

"Hey, Hanachii if it gets too heavy don't forget to tell me okay?" She said.

"Don't worry about it." I said. "Maybe someday, if I sort things out."

"Welp, bye then!" Mino said as she went out of school.

I stood still by the entrance, spaced out in air.

"Were you waiting for me, Hanabi?" Yamato's voice surprised me. He was blushing as he was scratching his head from embarrassment, "You heard nothing let's just go." He said.

Was there supposed to be something I shouldn't hear?
I didn't hear anything weird from him. Or am I just too spaced out that I didn't notice?

And then again we were walking with each other to our apartment. I feel awkward as if I wanted to distance myself from him and I wanted to forget the things that I overheard but it just spinning all over my head and couldn't stop myself but get curious.

We were completely silent before we arrived at our home. I didn't say a word or look at him even for just a second. I just went inside our apartment without saying anything to Yamato. I changed my clothes and jumped on my bed, I looked up social media to cool off my mind with some random memes I came across to. Until I saw a post from Kanae. Dad's new wife. As a family, they all looked so happy.

I feel like I'm the only one who thinks this is so messed up. How our family is close to our dad's new family the other side sometimes asks me or Kei to visit them, I don't even know how Kei managed to agree to that.

But thinking about our family makes me remember what I overheard and now I feel like I don't care anymore. I want proof... I want to know who I really am.

I stepped out of my room then I saw Kei-niisan smiling on his own while typing through his phone. It must be Mino.

I helped mom prepare our dinner after I washed my hands. "Well this is unusual, not stuck in your room doing your homework?" Kei -niisan said.

I sighed and said,  "What's worse is that you're not even trying to find any college to enroll to. You might even end up stopping in college."

He gasped, "I- I'm working on it-" Kei-niisan pouted like a little baby on a couch.

"So you don't have any homework?" mom asked.

"None, which is why I'm free to help you out. Unlike Kei-niisan who's always free." I said and locked my eyes to Kei-niisan.

"Oi! I can hear you!" Kei -niisan shouted back.

"Then come help us out you pig!" I shouted back while pointing the knife at him. "Don't just slack off in couch letting mom do all the work! Konobakayero!" I walked closer to him and smacked his head. Mom laughed as soon as she saw both of us fighting. Both of us glared at mom whispering to each other, "Look at mom- she should be stopping us from fighting but instead, she's enjoying it." Kei-niisan murmured.

"I'm sorry it's been a while since we've been like this." She said as she went close to us.

"What do you mean mom? We're always fighting." Kei-nissan said.

She spread out her arms and hugged both of us with her teary eyes. "Mo-mom what's the big idea?" Kei-niisan said.

"I'm so blessed to have the both of you." She said.

I wanted to stay low but my mouth ended up moving on its own.

"I'm your daughter right?" I asked. "You're not hiding anything from me right?"

They both paused and looked at me as if they were surprised.

"Hanabi.... You—" Kei–nissan said but I cut him off by saying, "of course you're not hiding anything from me! I'm your daughter, right?" I cheerfully asked mom.

"Of course, you're my daughter." She said while smiling in front of me. "I'm not hiding anything from you."

"What's with the weird questions?" Kei–niisan asked.

Any longer I stay then they'll see me burst my tears out, so I figured a way to get out of this situation. "Oh right! I'll go and buy us a the other ingredients! I'll be right back!" I said as I immediately stepped out of our apartment and ran away.

As I continue running I realized what made me cry so hard, it was these heavy feelings inside my heart. My tears won't stop running down my cheeks as the rain started pouring from the sky. I can't stop running as if I wanted to run away forever.

I should be glad that they care for me despite that I'm not their real daughter.
But why do I feel so hurt?

Why do I feel so hurt after I realize they were hiding it from me?
Why don't I even know anything about me?

A light came flashing before me on an empty road, I was paralyzed as if I was back in my weird dream. This is the same, loud honking and a light flashed before me.

But no. This is not a dream... This is real, a real vehicle coming straight at me. Why am I not moving?

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