Till Death do we Part

Chase

I don't like remembering this time in my life but it is part of my story so i guess it must be told. After they died I was taken home by my grandmother and I stayed locked in my new room in her house. The room used to be my mother's room and I could almost smell her and I could imagine her there if I closed my eyes. I grew comfortable with the room so much that often times I didn't even come out to eat. My grandma came in often to talk to me and try to get me to go outside or do something active. She would have to come in and try to convince me too eat a lot of the time. Sometimes I would spend hours in front of the mirror just trying to see part of my parents in me. I wonder if my long light brown hair was from my mother or father. I wonder where I got my green eyes or my high cheek bones. Everyone says I look like my parents but no matter how long I stand there I can't see them.

My grandmother isn't very old. She had my mother as a teenager, now she is about 60. Her hair is still a light brown and so curly that it sticks out everywhere. Her eyes are warm and she has a grandmother kind of smell. She still acts young though, she always wanted to know about school and boys when I came to visit. I always remember her talking to my mother harshly about taking me here even though I loved it here. I'm sure she loved having me here but she always pushed me on my way out the door after about a while. I have always asked my mother why but she just replies with a shrug and tells me it's just what she does.

My thoughts were disturbed by a knock on my door. "dear, may I come in?" my grandma said in a soft voice

"Yeah, come on in" I replied

She opened the door slowly and peeked in. she smiled at me and said "there is someone here to meet you"

This sentence surprised me more than anything. I just moved here I don't know who would want to meet me? Is my grandma trying to get me to meet new people here who are my age since I have to start school soon?

I walked out of the room slowly with my big sweater sleeves falling past my fingertips. My grandma's house in the small town was in the country so we don't get many visitors. I walked slowly into the kitchen where my grandma was sitting with a boy about my age at the stone kitchen island

The house had an almost modern look to it. Most of it was stone and the rest was a beautiful light yellow color, light the grass in the fields. The house was in a circle shape and had a lot of windows overlooking the field that went on for miles that horses often grazed on. The only house was a wood cabin to the north of us. I have never been there but every time I tried it just seemed to get further and further away. There are windows are all the way around the house except for the bedrooms. The kitchen was on the far right of the house and my room was on the far left. In-between were the living room and the computer room. There was a big couch and a TV on the wall above the fireplace. My grandmother doesn't get cable out here so she has a huge cabinet full of almost every movie imaginable. The house was quite big considering the amount of money my family has. The kitchen is its own spate room. It has a window over the sink that overlooks a stream. My grandmother has shelves full of colored plates and cups. The fridge is by the dish washer and right in the middle is a round table made of a light colored wood. She also has a bar table along the edge across from the stove.

I stood in the entrance to the kitchen for a second before coming in. The boy and my grandmother both looked over at me. The boy was cute and had a familiar look to him. He had dark brown hair that was jelled up in the front. His eyes were blue and he wore a grey leather jacket over a plain white T-shirt. He had jeans on and his tennis shoes were worn down.

"Sutton this is Chase" she said while looking at me questioningly

"Hi" I said softly. I don't know why he was so important to my grandma. She had gotten him some water and a tune melt. They were just sitting there talking like they were really good friends. The one thing that puzzled me is that chase was so familiar.

Chase looked at me for a while then replied "do you remember me" with a smile I swear I had seen before.

"Umm I guess not" I said as I looked at them both laugh a little.

My grandma looked at me and giggled a little bit more. "He was your best friend, when you came to visit you would always be playing outside with chase. You guys were inseparable." The look on her face was that she hopped I would find comfort in knowing someone here but it only reminded me of my parents. We used to have the best time here. I remembered playing outside in the field with Chase and I remember my parents calling our names for lunch time. We would sit at the round table, that once was so big, and eat tuna melts and talk about dragons and castles. We would build forts and hide in them when Chase's parents came to get him. I remember the way my mother used to laugh with us and chase us around the house.

My eyes clouded and the little half smile faded from my face. Both of them saw it. I ran back to my room, my eyes stinging. I finally got to my room and tears burst out and down my face. My head was pounding and my heart ached. As I slumped against my wall I heard them talking in the kitchen.

"Maybe it was too early?" my grandma said

"The first time is always going to be hard, I'll go talk to her" Chase said

I could hear his footsteps coming to my room. I sank down into the corner and curled up against the wall. I put my head in between my crossed arms and cried.

Chase opened the door slowly and looked around. He saw me and came and sat down in front of me. We both sat in silence for a while (except for my uncontrollable sniffling), I was waiting for him to say something but he never did. A couple minutes passed by and I finally took my head out of my arms and looked at him. Chase was looking out the window and he turned his head to look at me.

"my brother died last year" he said "I know what it's like to love someone and loose them, but i also know what it feels like when you think it's your fault"

When he looked at me I could see the sadness in his eyes. His eyes. They were beautiful. The outside was a soft blue like the ocean and it soothed you but the inside was the kind of blue that makes you freeze. It's almost like there is a cold side to him but the outside is soft.

"I'm sorry" is all I could say in between sniffles. He broke his gaze from my eyes and got up to get me the Kleenex box. He sat next to me on the wall this time, handing me the box. He put his head against the wall and said one thing and one thing only.

"I knew this would happen"