my disorders are not pretty.
anxiety is shortness of breath and shaky hands
lumps in my throat and a swarm of bugs in my stomach.depression is hot tears and puffy eyes.
"im just tired"s and "im fine"s
messy hair and unmotivated days in bedinsomnia is restless nights and jittery feet
checking my clock and try to force my self into slumberocd is repeating thoughts in my head and annoying habits.
chewing my nails while "i cant do it" is repeating in my head over and over.but i, i am not my disorder.
i am constellations of freckles, bright blue eyes and a brain full of lyrics.
i am loud laughs and epiphanies of life and happiness.
i am nights talking about nothing at 4 am under the stars on averys trampoline
i am an obsession with cigarettes and old music.
i am full of ideas and creativity.
i am walks on the moon and standing outside the sun roof with loud music
i am pictures of the sunset and tinted clouds
i am walks in the woods and skipping stones
i am a space cadet. i am me.
and i am not my disorder.
-a