Mine To Keep

Was she a good kisser?

My heart shattered into million pieces.

It felt like I was drowning and breathing my last breath.
It felt like my whole world was crashing down from beneath me.

I wanted to run, to cry, to scream. But I was to shocked and angry to react.

She had her filthy red nails scraping against Blake's head. Tugging at his black lose strings.
Her chest was pressed up against his body doing small circles against his crotch.

I wanted to run to them, pull that blond bitch away from him. Banging her head against the cement and spit in her face watching her cringe against my grip.

I saw Blake's hands one her hips slowly pulling away. And that's when I finally broke lose and ran.

I ran so fast I though I was going to die. If I haven't already.

My legs began to move even faster, I wanted to feel adrenaline pumping in my veins.

I wanted the pain to go away, my heart was pumping so hard agains my chest. I was holding my bag in a hard grip while I ran. Home, the place I never though I wanted to come to. I would always ran away from it.

My parents cars were gone, they where at work.

I didn't mind. I wanted to be alone, alone.

Alone like I always would be.

I slammed the door behind me and ran up to my room, i haven't stop running until I hit the bed and fall agains it with a Thud.

The tears haven't fallen get, my eyes was dry.

I could take the beating from my parents, I could take the pain from the blade, I can take the feeling of sorrow. But I can't take the feeling of reaction and forgotten. I can't take the pain of not being good enough. And I can't take the feeling of seeing Blake kissing another girl.

Was I that awkward and ugly to be with?

The feeling wouldn't go away, the tugging at my chest only grow harder.

In the heat of the moment my phone began to ring. I looked at the ID and was only a meter from pressing Decline. But my body wouldn't listen.

"Hello" I said, my voice where a little sore and I was still breathing kinda hard from the run. I wasn't the best runner.

"Hey baby, where are you I have been waiting for a very long time outside school" he said sterling. I wanted to puke. He was lying striate to my without a guilt in the world.

"Charlotte gave me a drive" I lied.

"I said that I would take you home Liz" he said and sigh. I heard a car door slamming shout and a quick.

"I be there in five" and then he hung up

He was going to be here in five minutes. Fuck.

I wasn't ready, I can't see him right now, I'm not ready.

What do I say? The thru of seeing him kissing another girl. or lie.

I heard a small knock against my door after a couple of minutes.

Maybe five knocks when I haven't moved an inch.