Storm of throes

Chapter 2

"Shruthi,listen to me.We won't get someone like this once again.I don't think we are that lucky.",my father tells me sweetly just as I sit down for breakfast.I think about what Kavya told me last night but the term marriage only makes me imagine a life full of fights,kids and responsibilities which might eventually make me loose my career.I shake my head and say,"Daddy,I need some time.Please don't force me into this."

"What are you talking.I'm growing old and I want to finish off my duties and be relaxed.Is there anything wrong in that?"

"I never told I don't want this.I only asked you for some time so I could think."

"What is there for you to think?That man is not gonna wait for you all his life.Shruthi,I don't want to hear anything but a yes.",he says so casually as if it were so simple a decision.

"So is it ok if I come with a divorce paper in one month saying that I hate this guy?"He stays silent,surprised by my sudden out-burst.Its been quiet a few years since I have said things like that.I've been a puppet ever since that incident with my mother happened.I didn't want to argue,I didn't want to create any more fights,whatever that was going on already seemed more than enough.If they weren't old enough to know what sacrifice meant,I wanted to be the elderly person who knew it.So,I sacrificed.All those million times I wanted to talk back,fight for all those tiny pleasures I wanted to enjoy but I kept shut,swallowed every bit of my wishes just to have peace which seemed more necessary than anything else.But,now is not the time to sacrifice.This is something long-term,someone who is going to be with me forever.Atleast,that is what I want it to be.

"I'm not shouting back to that cause I'm not gonna wait for your permission anymore.You are meeting him and that is it."I look at him with a challenging stare,surprised at my guts.

"Oh yea,I'll meet him and tell him things that would make him run a thousand mile without turning back."I say with a smile so wicked that it makes my dad's pupils enlarge.He sighs and leaves after losing the who-stares-longer game.I am sure this is not the end but for now,I'm glad I managed to shut his mouth.But then,was I not supposed to give Kavya's idea a second and serious thought?But this man pissed me off so bad that I forgot what I was supposed to do.

"To the hell with these people.",I mutter and rush out with my bag.Surprisingly,as much as I was irked by all that was going on,I felt satisfied.Happy that after a long long time,I could stand up for myself.Near the stairs in my office,I spot Kavya and run to her.

"Hey sisy!",I tap her harder than I intend to and she stumbles.

"Oye!",she says,straightening her dress,a green and red salwaar.I shoot her a goofy grin until she shuts my funny mood with an annoying question.

"So whats going on about your marriage issue?"I stop walking and look at the ground,half worried about not giving Kavya's views a second thought and the rest irritated about this whole issue.I wish I had more control over my life,more space for my views and a lot more chances to feel free and happy.Kavya turns back to look at me,standing frozen in my place.

"Hey,what ya?",she steps down to me,her look of concern cutting through my confused mind.I shake my head as an attempt of convincing her and taking away my mind with things which better be given a thought some other time.But the ever so brilliant sister of mine finds out that something is wrong.She keeps pestering me to say all the way upstairs and finally,I tell her.

"Dude ya,its still not too late.You can talk to him properly when he comes to meet  you.You can still set things straight and give it a second thought,you know.",she says convincingly.And just like the little kid that I have always been,I cry.

"Oh Shruthi,come on.Why are you crying now.Baby girl,this is really silly.Trust me,everything will be fine and you'll find a solution without anyone forcing you into anything."Kavya and I have been close enough for us to judge the other's problem without being said.She wipes away my tears and feeds me some water. I gulp a lot of water and cry louder. I don't know why I was crying but I just did until I notice the few people look at our side,waiting to spread rumors.