Arranged Marriage : j.b ✔

19 Rain rain, go away...

Justin

"Sir, we've reached" My driver snapped me out of my thoughts and I realized that we've reached home.

"Oh yeah" I said and got out.

I must've seemed like a turtle as I wearily walked till the door of the house, I checked my phone to see the time. '2:30 am' and I sighed hard.

"Fine....but if I come home early, we'll go shopping alright?"

Wow, I'm pretty early.

I fished for the keys in my pocket and unlocked the door and shut it behind me after I got in. I could tell that the T.V was on since I could hear the sounds as I walked through the hallway.

When I entered the living room I saw 'Step brothers' playing on the T.V while Scarlett had fallen asleep on the couch. I bet she was waiting for me. I wondered if she had even eaten her dinner as I got rid of my coat and placed it on the recliner beside the sofa.

I switched of the T.V and I picked up the peacefully sleeping Scarlett in my arms who must be so mad at me but she's going to show me that she isn't.

But what will happen when I tell her what's to come tomorrow?

I walked into her bedroom and placed her on the bed gently and tucked her in before sitting down beside her.

Just yesterday we were better than we had ever been and I have no idea how will she react tomorrow when I tell her how fucked up things are.

But one thing I don't understand is myself. If I'm so into Scarlett then why do I feel like it's my responsibility when it comes to Selena?

Its like, when I look at Selena, I get reminded of the time we've spent together and I feel like what if, this thing with Scarlett is an illusion? What if I choose Scarlett and after a while I realize that I made the wrong choice?

But when I look at Scarlett, it's like I don't want anything else but her. I'd be stupid if I try to deny that I'm in love with her.

Who am I kidding; I'm crazily, madly, deeply in love with her.

But why do I get shaken up when Selena comes around? I wonder how Scarlett feels about all this, I wonder if she feels the same about me.

I flicked off my shoes and got rid of my socks. I stripped out of my shirt and pants leaving myself in my boxers only.

I don't know how me and Scarlett will be from tomorrow but I just want to able to hold her through the night for once, once if that's all we are going to get.

I got under the duvet beside her and spooned her from behind. Just as I did that and sigh of relief left me and felt more comfortable than I ever had. Her smell, her warmth, the way she fits so perfectly in my arms, I don't think I'll ever be able to forget this feeling.

Honestly, I would've never traded Scarlett for Selena if there was some other reason but she's sick and she needs me. I can't just ignore her like that in the condition she is in.

But Scarlett, how will I stay away from her when I've gotten so connected to her.

I used to imagine me and Scarlett being like a normal couple 24/7 when we were distant and now that we were getting there, I'm pushing her away again.

I only realized I was crying when I pulled her closer and tighter and buried my face in her hair. I'm starting to miss her already. I don't know how am I going to do this.

I hate this, I hate myself.

"I'm sorry Scar....I'm so sorry" I whispered and inhaled deeply to keep from sobbing.