She

Chapter 2

Losing something usually means you will eventually find it. I wish it were that way with people. When you lose someone. They can't come back. Though you may have their things and your memories. Memories fade and things can get misplaced. Nothing lasts forever, especially people.

Today was no different than any other. We woke, we ate, we kissed, and we cleaned. It wasn't until dinner when I noticed that something seemed off. When I placed the bowl of chicken Alfredo on the table she wasn't there like normal. She was in the bathroom and had been for a while now. I knocked softly on the door.

"Everything okay?"

"Y-Yeah. I decided to shower, that's all."

That was wrong, she usually showers after dinner, there was one thing showering this early meant, and it wasn't good.

"Babe. What's wrong, talk to me."

"I said everything is fine. I'll finish getting dressed then I'll join you for dinner, don't wait on me." Her reply was soft and scratchy.

"Please come out soon..." I leave her be and sit at the table. My mind going at full speed, I was racking my brain to figure out what happened. What caused this. What I could do. My chicken Alfredo didn't look appetizing anymore. I felt sick.

"Hey sorry." She comes into the kitchen with a small smile, "Ooh, looks good baby." She sits and begins to eat.

"What's going on, what did you do, what happened?" My questions come out like word vomit.

"Everything is fine babe, no need to worry. I just felt gross after cleaning out the shed, I needed to wash off."

"No, you're lying. You would have asked for my help."

"Babe... please, can this wait until after we are finished eating?"

"Fine."

We eat in a painful silence, it tears away at my brain and eats at my heart. She looks fine, but I know that's just a facade. I still feel sick, and the smell of food doesn't help. I chew on my lip and stir my food around. Still thinking hard about what may have caused this sudden shower. I don't want to accept that one thought that keeps coming up no matter how much I push it down.

She's hurting herself.

She finally finishes eating, and I watch her put her dish in the sink.

"Tell me what's going on."

I watch her face, searching for any hint to what is going on. She seems worried. Her brows furrow and she squints at the table as if she were trying to think of a good answer.

"I..." She begins, "I haven't been this way since high school."

"What do you mean?" I reach across the table and take her hand.

"I... I can't explain it well..."

"Just try baby. Please, you're worrying me."

She takes a deep break and looks at me, "I'm depressed again. And I don't know what's causing it."

I nod slowly, "it'll be okay. I promise."

She smiles weakly, her lower lip trembling slightly. "I- I just don't want it to get bad again."

I stand and go over to her, "I will do anything in my power to make sure it doesn't."

She nods and stands, looking up at me, "Thank you."

I smile and pull her close. She seems to relax into me even though she gripping onto my shirt. I softly take her chin and bring her lips to mine, and she softly pulls my shirt, as if she were trying to pull me closer, even though our bodies were pressed against each other. I also know she wants this kiss to be more than just a kiss.