Life choices (Remus Lupin Marauders era)

Chapter 21

Lupin's POV

I have to go and visit her before the train leaves for the holidays. I won't be able to think properly until I do. My mind is whirling with endless scenarios, all which end with her dead and me expelled.

I drag myself down to the hospital wing and wait at the front desk for a nurse. She bustles in, straightening out her skirts and running a hand through her wild hair.

"How can I help you?" She beams down at me.

"I wanted to see Imogen Prewett before I leave." I say quietly.

"Sure, I think someone else is by her bed now but you can go and wait with her."

I thank her and head through the big doors into the room lined with beds. All of them are empty except for a screen protecting one at the very end. I hear low murmurs coming from the other side and pause, hoping to listen in on what she is saying.

"I'm so sorry that I didn't come out and look for you when you didn't arrive. I just assumed you were having the time of your life, getting to know this guy. I really wish you'd wake up soon, I have so much to talk to you about. I guess you don't realise what you had until it's gone."

She pauses and I hear the rustling of paper or something crinkling under her touch. I just wish that it was her waking up.

"You were right. Lily succumbed to James. They danced at the ball although she said it was just the spiked drinks that made her do it. None of us believe her. We're going to find out who did this, I promise."

I hear the sound of the chair being moved back and Mary appears from around the corner. She sees me and her eyes widen before narrowing into slits.

"What the fuck are you doing here?" She snarls.

"I wanted to see how she was." I stammer.

"Why do you care?! You never cared before!" She yells and steps up really close to my face. "You hurt her, practically every single day and you acted like you didn't give a shit about it. She's not friendless, she's not a freak, and even if she was I would still love her, because she's my sister!" She bellows and tears flow down her cheeks. "She's my bloody sister and I bloody love her you bitch." She falls to the floor sobbing and I crouch down next to her.

"I am so sorry. I never wanted anything like this to happen, I swear."

"So you did do it." She whispers through her tears. "I'm not going to tell anyone, I'm no snitch. I just want you to feel terrible for what you've done to her."

"I do." I say quietly. "I really feel terrible."

"Good." She mutters, standing up quickly and wiping away her tears. "She's all yours."

I watch as she walks away and head behind the screen to where Imogen lies with her eyes closed and her skin deathly pale. I look around the room before taking the seat next to her bed.

"Hey, Imgoen. I wanted to check on you, I was worried when the door opened and you were just lying there. I haven't been able to stop thinking about it, you're invading my mind and I hate but love it." I sigh. "I wish you could wake up for the holidays, your family won't want to spend it without you. They'll miss you."

There's nothing. No flutter of the eyelashes, no little hand twitch. She's still and dead-looking like before.

"I'm sorry. For everything that I've done to you." I whisper quietly, letting a couple of tears roll silently down my cheeks. "I don't want to hurt you anymore."

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James's POV

I walk along the halls, looking for Moony but decide to stay hidden under my invisibility cloak. I watch as he talks to the nurse and slips into the ward. I quickly follow him in before the door shuts and traps me outside.

I almost fling off the cloak, but I hear speaking and decide to wait before I reveal myself to him.

Mary appears from around the corner and immediately starts verbally attack Remus. He tries to defend himself but she keeps of shouting at him as the tears flow freely down her cheeks. He looks crushed as he weakly defends himself.

I bet Sirius would love to be here, comforting crying girls is something which he prides himself on, surprisingly. We all have our soft sides, I guess. I think it's clear to say who mine is.

They chat lowly for a bit before she leaves us and walks around to her bedside. I quietly follow him and stand back a bit as he sits next to her still body. He looks down at her for a while before actually starting to speak.

"Hey, Imgoen. I wanted to check on you, I was worried when the door opened and you were just lying there. I haven't been able to stop thinking about it, you're invading my mind and I hate but love it." He sighs. "I wish you could wake up for the holidays, your family won't want to spend it without you. They'll miss you."

My heart thuds in my chest and I find myself feeling like absolute shite for the both of them. I feel guilty, like its my fault, which it partially is, but still.

"I'm sorry. For everything that I've done to you. I don't want to hurt you anymore."

I watch as a couple of tears roll down his cheeks and my heart breaks. I want to go out and comfort him, to tell him that we'll all stop. But I know that I can't let on that I've been eavesdropping.

Why didn't I just let them be happy together.