One Little Kiss

One More Departure

   "I don't understand. What's going on, Peter?" I ask, confusion clear in my voice. He's leaving. Was it something that I did? I don't know. I really don't know.

   "See, my dad... he's sick, Di. I know that you know what's like to watch a parent slowly die. Well, my mother did some research about it, and she found a treatment center. But it's in New York." that's when he did start crying. I had never seen him cry. I held him for a little bit, then decided what I wanted to say.

   "I know that you are going. I'm not stupid, and I know you well enough to know that you wouldn't just let him die if you could do something about it. But... what about us?" I know that what I asked was selfish and inconsiderate, and, trust me, I hate myself for it. But I had to know. While he was in New York, what would happen to our love? How would it survive? Would it even survive, in the first place?

   "I guess that we will have to endure a long-distance relationship, or.... break-up." he said, not meeting my eyes. I think that was when I broke.

   "Are you kidding me? Is this a sick joke? Or some horrible, twisted way of breaking up with me? I just almost gave up my virginity to you, you-" I was interrupted by him gently sliding me off his legs, and getting up.

   "No, it isn't, Di. I kind of wish it was, but it isn't." he was putting on his shirt at this point.

   "I hate you! I hate you so much! You ruined everything! I hate you!" I start bawling, and yelling out horrible things at him. He takes it all, putting on his jacket and staring at me as I cry. That stupid idiot. I hate him. I hate him, I hate him, I HATE HIM! I cry so hard because the truth is I love him. And me reacting this way kind of shows him how much this is hurting me.

   "Are you finished, Dianna?" he asks, formally using my whole name. This is it. This is how it all ends. At least that's what I thought.

   He scoops me up in his arms, and kisses me so passionately that my heart begins pounding, and I can't breathe.

   "I love you. I'm sorry. I love you. I hate myself for what I just did. I'm so sorry. I love you..." I mutter constantly in his ear between kisses. How I wish this would never end...

   But it has to.

   He breaks away from and looks me in the eye. "Promise you'll wait for me. Promise." he whispers, still holding me.

   "Yes. Of course." I say. Like I could really ever find someone else who would be better than him. That I could love more than him.

   "Okay. Here I go. I love you. Wait for me. I love you." He hurries out, stumbling out the door. I follow him out, grabbing my keys. Then, I shut the door behind me.

    "I love you. You know I'll wait. I love you." I call back. We hurry to his car together. He kisses me hard, and then he gets in the car. He starts the car, and rolls down the passenger seat window. We yell to each other 'I love you' and other things. I follow the car until it makes a turn, a block away from my house. Then, I walk home alone, crying and thinking of all the things that I should have said.