Finding the Wolf Within

Chapter 6

I don’t know why Lindy insisted that it was going to take 4 hours to get ready for the dance, but she and Leigh came over to my place with their outfits and makeup right after school. As they sat in front of my mirror chatting and experimenting with each other’s hair, I laid on my back across my bed, looking up at my ceiling that I had long ago decorated with glow-in-the-dark stars. My mom had given me permission to redecorate my room two years ago, so I had painted the walls a light lavender and decorated one entire wall with exotic plants and birds. Since painting was a hobby of mine, I think I did a pretty good job, and I liked the fact that the rainforest setting was exactly where you wouldn’t find a wolf. It was like a private joke, a recognition that this room could be my sanctuary away from both human and wolf concerns. Now I guess I just had to wait a couple more days before I could actually say that the room was a retreat from my wolf side.

Even though my friends were in the room, I found myself daydreaming about what it would be like once I finally turned sixteen. Of course, creeping in on those thoughts was also a constantly changing fantasy of what would transpire if Eddie happened to be my mate. I alternated between running happily into his waiting arms and giving him the cold shoulder just to teach him a lesson. What I thought I could say for certain though, was that no matter who my mate ended up being, I wanted to take it slow, to actually get to know, like, and even love the person before I committed body and soul to them. Old-fashioned, yes. But I think it’s the only way I can reconcile the fact that my wolf knows who is right for me with the need to be an independent, modern woman.

I remember when Lindy turned sixteen, she spent the whole day at school a nervous wreck, thinking that she may spot her mate amongst our classmates. She had already made a list of all the eligible guys and gone through them, crossing off anyone she didn’t like. In the end, the list ended up with all of the names crossed off, since everyone had one thing or another wrong with them. Even Matt’s name had a big slash through it, and when he found out and pouted about it, Lind just said that he was automatically excluded since it would be weird to mate with him. She even shuddered a bit at the thought of them seeing each other naked.

I’m not as obsessive about the whole mating thing. However, while I wouldn’t admit it to Lindy when she asked me if I had given any thought to a potential mate, Eddie was the first and only guy to pop into my head. She gave me a knowing look though and launched off on yet another one of her rants about his hotness. It still seems so crazy to me because it’s not like I’ve had a lot of interaction with Eddie, or I’ve befriended him and gotten to know him as a person. But I feel like I DO know him, or I guess more accurately, I know his potential, the person he wants to be if he could just recognize and accept the fact that he didn’t have to be a jerk. In the end though, I guess it’s all for naught anyway since we have no choice in who our mate is.

“Hey Ceci – are you sleeping? Yoo hoooo…”

“I’m awake, I’m awake.”

“Geez, okay. Well you did space out there for over an hour. Leigh and I have decided how we’re going to do our hair. Do you know how you’re doing yours?”

“Ummm…I’m going to leave it as is?”

“Nuh uh. I’ll do your hair for you. You have got to go all out. Tonight’s going to be like a celebration of your last days as a fifteen-year-old. Come Tuesday, you’ll be a full were…”

“I know, I know,” I quickly interjected before Lindy spilled the beans to Leigh, “I’ll be a full woman at the ripe old age of sixteen. I hope it’ll be sweet.”

I grinned up at Leigh to ease the sudden tension in the air as Lindy realized what she had been about to say. Luckily, Leigh didn’t seem to have noticed the slip-up.