Isinglass

Chapter 5

"We can't stay here."

It's only been two weeks since I woke in the small cabin on the river but it seems my future here is already in question. All of our futures, to be accurate. The tension has been mounting as the topic has already been the source of much disagreement between the three of them the last few weeks, with me a silent guest. I have my opinions but don't feel as though it's my place to weigh in. Not yet.

Christopher's words instantly silence the conversation around the dinner table. Glancing back and forth between one another, none of us speaks.  We've been over this before: Christopher is convinced that our days here are numbered while Emma worries that by leaving we will be giving up what little security we had without any promise of something better. For her part, Rosemary tends to defer to Christopher but is largely and uncharacteristically quiet about it.

"Why can't we stay?" Emma demands. "We have food stores, a garden, a well, and that fireplace makes winter far less daunting. I've been out there, Chris. We're not going to find anything better." She fixes him with a challenging glare, a look I've become quite familiar with. You never have to wonder where Emma stands on an issue, her face revealing her every emotion. Not that it would matter because she always says exactly what's on her mind, which is often fueled by tension and anger. Guarded and stand-offish, it is clear to me that something's happened to her, something she isn't talking about.

"Emma, I understand that, but things have changed," he replies. "With the flood waters receding, the current has started dragging out more debris from the towns upriver. Between the chemicals and the... and the dead, the water is as good as poisoned. We can't eat any fish we catch and even the deer in the area have started to leave in search of clean water. It's going to be years before this place recovers."

"And don't forget that we probably have those militia crazies hunting us, thanks to our new friend here," adds Rosemary, pointing a carrot-laden fork in my direction. Christopher gives her a reproachful look, but she only shrugs. "What? It's true, isn't it? I'm not saying it's all Jacob's fault, but let's not pussyfoot around the issue. If they decide to look for him, their gonna follow the water. Even if we were to stay out of sight, they'll see the cabin and want to check it out." She's right, of course. Staring down at my plate, I wonder if they might have been better off leaving me where they found me.

For the past two weeks, life had started taking on a sense of normalcy- as normal as you could expect given the circumstances. With my arm healing more quickly than expected, I have been able to help out with simple tasks, like hauling buckets of water from the well and weeding the small vegetable garden. It feels good to be busy with these simple, mundane tasks, but more than that it is being with people again that touches me deepest. Christopher has welcomed me from the start, spending hours with me in conversation. At first, I assumed he was simply interested in what information I could provide but it has become clear that he is just as interested in me as a person as well. I suspect we might become good friends.

Rosemary has been a breath of fresh air. When you get past her stern bluntness, you find a truly kind woman with a big heart. She has tended to my gunshot wound with the practiced hand of a nurse and the gentle care of a mother. In charge of the food, she has been slipping me a little extra with each meal, winking at me with a grin of playful conspiracy. Molly has taken to her too, rarely leaving the old woman's side. It looks like I've lost my dog, but I'm pleased they bring each other so much comfort.

Emma has been a tougher nut to crack. We have only had a few exchanges over the past weeks, most of which were conversations of necessity about chores where she would give me instructions and I would promptly comply. Again, I am left with the strong sense that deep anger and fear are fueling her, but it is too soon to broach that topic. I've asked Chris, but he hasn't been willing to say much. "Give her time" he keeps telling me, "She'll come around". And so, I am surprised now when it is Emma who quickly speaks up in my defense.