Moving on isn't forgetting,it's remembering without hurting.
-The Heartbroken Heartbreaker(Story)
Author's Note:
Warning!!! This book contains strong language all through. You read at your own risk.
t was on Friday the 13. For an unlucky day my day was going really well,and by well I mean I managed to settle down at my new school,keeping a low profile,making sure I'd ignored everyone and vice versa. That's how my days went. After the incident I had become cold,I didn't cry,didn't laugh or feel fear. I didn't feel shit anymore, I didn't want to so I stayed away from people. I liked it that way. I basically checked out for a year and a whole lot had happened that year. After high school I moved in with my aunt in a beach house at Hawaii, I wanted to be as far away from what used to be home as possible. She was alone so it was easy living there, it was peaceful and quiet. She tried talking to me and even made me see a therapist. I agreed to go just to shut her up plus it really didn't change anything. Everything I tried to feel was equated to sadness so there was no point trying.
Flashback.
I had just got back from my surfing lessons and was going through the fridge to find something to eat. I was in the middle of making a sandwich when my aunt entered the kitchen and I glanced at her to acknowledge her presence. She tried to spark up a conversation with me,the usual inquiry about how my day went.
"How was your day?" She asked.
"Good"
Silence..
"How's the surfing lessons going,starting to get the hang of it?
"Yeah" I said giving her my usual monosyllabic answers.
"So this is how we're gonna stay huh?" She asked pointing her index finger back and forth at me and her which was followed by an uncomfortable silence.
She snapped after not hearing an answer.
"Why are you doing this to yourself?" She yelled tears rolling down her cheeks "why are you doing this to me? You think it's easy seeing you like this. It hurts so bad and the fact that I try so hard to get you to open up but you refuse is just frustrating. You think you're the only one hurting? You keep everything all bottled up inside. Don't you see, you're turning into your mum".
She spat out the last part with so much venom in her voice. I jerked just as I was about to put the sandwich in my mouth and put it down.
Like a child who blurted out a curse word in front of their parent,she clasped her mouth with her hands after realizing what she had said.
"Oh my God sweetie I didn't mean to-"
"It's alright" I said cutting her off before she could finish "I know you didn't mean it" then started walking away
"Aren't you going to finish your sandwich?" She called out.
"I'm not hungry" I said then quickly left to my room before she could protest any further.
It was then that I realized how right she was. I was becoming her.
End of flashback.
My aunt helped me unpack and settle down. She was loaded so she paid for a whole dorm for me so I didn't have to share,and for that I was so grateful. I missed her so much already, she was the only one I had open up to.
I was a freshman at YALE university. It was beautiful out here in New York,I'd always wanted to come here.
Classes started 2 days ago but a lot of the students hadn't resumed yet and some are just settling in. The school was full of students and families dropping them off.
