Jacquees

- 2

Beauty

"My hair falling apart. I'm stressing. I can't eat. I'm losing weight. I'm itching. I'm twitching. Turning and twisting. I want to feel alive. I want to feel comfortable, but I don't want to leave this bed. I'm stuck in a hole in there's no easy way of getting out. Knee to face. Arms wrapped around knee. Heart aching. Eyes swelled up. Nose irritated and transform to the color of red. I'm scared.. WELL IF I CAN'T GET OUT OF THIS HOLE.. Well if I'm stuck in it forever and there's just no way of getting out. I JUST WANT TO GET OUT!" I release anger through the lips of my mouth. My lips were  dry and I haven't eaten for days. I was to weak to move. I laid my head on the dull white wall. 

"I missed you, Beauty." Jacquees said in a drowsy voice as he entered  the room, well his room. I could tell he was not himself just like any other day.  All Jacquees have been doing is injecting himself with needles. I'm to damage to help him. How am I going to help when I need help my damn self? His making this situation a whole lot worst. I eyed him from the side as he gradually walked in a fragile matter.  

"Come here." He said with a smile as he was gently pulling onto my arm. I shook my head no. I resist his demand. I was really incurable or sick. My body was weak. Jacquees claim the gun didn't shot me. I just had a wound from it, but my hypothesis is telling me otherwise.

"I said come here." He said laughing uncontrollably. 

"No, Jacquees. I don't feel really good." I said softly, removing his palms once again.

 "I'm trying to please you, but you keep rejecting me. I hate getting rejected. I've felt that shit all through my life and do not want to feel it in the future. I'm trying my best with you, but you don't see that. I could honestly say I love you. Pleaase say it back." He begged. 

"Jaquee- Just leave me alone to rest." I said really feeling like I'm about to pass out any second.

"I'm try-"

"Jacquee-" Before I could even tell him how deeply I was exhausted and tired he had his tongue down my mouth. It was like our tongues were dancing together and our lips went along with the melody. I never felt so alive. The feelings were just taking over my body. I felt a deep connection. A connection I haven't had since my dad died. But this was way more advance for me. Not only was this my first time being kissed, but my first time having someone tongue in my mouth.. And there was his touches. Goosebumps speared throughout my body. My insides were tingling with interest on this event. I felt his hands wrap around my lower bottom. 

"Wait." I said gently pushing him off. He glared at me then rolled his eyes as he got off me. I wiped my lips wishing I never stopped him. 

"Yo! What the fuck?!" He started yelling. I closed my ears, cause the drugs possessed his train of thoughts. I close my eyes only wishing I hadn't move in with him. "Dawg! I can't fucking do this with you. Why you acting like a little bitch?! Its the same ol shit with you. Fuck wrong with you?!" He asked cursing at me.

"Stop." I said rocking myself as I closed my eyes and block him out by covering my ears.

"What?! Its fucking true and you know that shit! I see the way you be looking at me. I know my moms a fucking hoe. Your moms to! So don't fucking play." He yelled flippin the script causing me to react. I pulled my head up slowly. I had hate in my eyes and my lips formed a mug. My pulse racing. My hands shaking.

"Yeah, I fucking said it. Even my boys did your moms." He commented. He boosted my level of anger. I was shaking my head no cause I didn't want to believe the truth. I wanted it to be a lie. "Stop!" I said in a harsh tone.

"Or what?" He asked with a smirk on his face. "Don't play that innocent shit. I see the way niggas at school be looking at you. You probably fucking around in school." He said then added a chuckle.

 My fist balled up with the sheet. My lips were trembling. I could feel my tears releasing from my eye lids. "How could you say something like that??!" I screamed out, jumping off the bed bashing his face with my fist. "You know nothing about my mom!" I yelled punching his chest with so much anger. He took hold of my arms and shook me to death. I started breathing heavy. I looked him deep in his eyes. I felt some type of liquid dripping from my forehead. Jacquees release his grip from me. I rubbed against my forehead, only to find blood on my hands. I felt dizzy. My balance of standing wasn't able to be control. Slowly, but surely I felt half of my body going numb. I fell side way and everything went black. 

. . . 

I felt something, but something unexplained. It was hard to examine where I was at. I slowly but surely open my eyes to pure darkness. I squinted my eyes just to get a figure of something. My eyes caught on a figure of a human being. I scratch my forehead only because I don't know if my eyes were playing tricks on me. I felt the sheets I was laying on. I smelt the air of sickness. I sat up and seen the figure coming closer to me. 

"Beauty, I'm sorry. The drugs took over me." I could hear Jacquees lame excuse. I reach over to the lamp next to me and found myself in a hospital bed. 

"You are part of the reason why I'm in the hospital and you're blaming a fucking drug habit cause of that?? Grow the fuck up." I said out of anger. 

"I lost control, sorry. I didn't know how much I took. I swear, I'll cut down a bit. Once you come home with me everything will be back to normal. A nigga put that on it's momma grave if she even still alive." 

I chuckle. "Go home with you?" I asked in a funny matter. "That's cute. The only time I'll be with or around you is when dicks could fly." I said with a attitude as I crossed my arms. 

"Well, well. Ms. Beauty got some balls now." Jacquees said laughing at his own dry ass joke. 

"I may appear off innocent and sweet, but when you put my fucking life in danger. I will have all the mouth in the world." I said in a outrage tone then mugged him. 

He started clapping and laughing like this was one of Kevin Hart shows. I rolled my eyes at the sight of him even being in this room. 

"Wow. You really impress me on this night. I'm starting to know the real you." He spoke with a tone that push my button.

"Bitch nigga you will never know the real me! This is the last time I'm seeing your fucking face. Don't be stalking me either, cause I don't want your irrelevant ass around me. Do you hear me?" I said popping my eyes out. "I said DO - YOU - FUCKING - HEAR - ME?" I yelled getting pissed off by this smile he kept on his face. 

 "You mad or mad as fuck?" He asked with a careless attitude. 

"I'm not mad neither am I mad as fuck. I'm pissed and I've been pissed off my whole fucking life. You know what?? Just GO. Just FUCKING go and never come back." I could feel tears about to drop and my blood pressure about to rise. Without another word he left and that's when all my anger turned into tears.