(I haven't done one of these lyric one-shots before, and I may not do one again, so wish me luck! Also, I am aware it's now May, but you see, I don't care.)
Careful what you say this time of year
Tends to weaken me
It was Christmas Eve, and I was eagerly awaiting Jon to call me. We've been in a long distance relationship for a while. It hurt sometimes, but I ultimately was happy.
And have a little decency and let me cry in peace
Its been a while. He should've called by now. I grew a bit concerned, and sad. He's probably just busy or something, and he'll call in a little while.
But there's a place where I erase the challenges I've been through
Where I know every corner, every street-name all by heart
I decided to text Dan while I waited. He always made me smile, even when worried.
And so it is a part of my courageous plan to leave
I couldn't contact Arin. I knew he'd be worried about me not calling him, but I have an even better surprise for him. It should be a few hours until I finally got to see him.
With a broken heart tucked away under my sleeve
I sighed; what I was doing was insane. I just had to hope Arin would be happy with me. I sat and waited.
I wanna go home for Christmas, let me go home this year
What was I doing? I was going to move in with Arin. I was going home. A home that felt like, well, home.
I wanna go home for Christmas
Let me go home this year
The night felt so lonesome without Jon here to joke with me. Why wouldn't he call? I even tried to contact him a few times, but to no avail. Why did he have to be busy on Christmas Eve?
I'll pack my bags and leave before the sun rises tomorrow
'cause we act more like strangers for each day that I am here
I went through with this outrageous plan because I felt like our relationship was deteriorating. I couldn't just stand there and watch that happen. Now I'm on a plane to Los Angeles, hoping that Arin will let me into his life.
But I have people close to me who never will desert me
Who remind me frequently what I was like as a child
I was now in a group text with Dan, Barry, and Ross. They all were worrying over me. They thought I was heartbroken. Sure, it did sting to be alone on Christmas Eve, but it was probably because of a busy schedule. It's no one's fault.
And so it is a part of my courageous plan to leave
With a broken heart tucked away under my sleeve
I realized my eyes were brimming with tears. I missed Arin so much. I felt my chest ache. I just gaze at the ground that was starting to look blurry. Avoid everybody's line of sight. I was getting a few concerned looks. Nobody approached me, though, to my relief. I didn't want to talk.
I wanna go home for Christmas, let me go home this year
I wanna go home for Christmas
Let me go home this year
I felt like I was being desperate and clingy. I couldn't stop myself from repeatedly calling Jon. I'm just being an annoyance.
Bzzt, bzz... Arin, are you okay? Dan sent me. I hadn't responded in a while.
No, I'm not, actually. I can't believe he would do this on Christmas Eve.
I'm so sorry, Arin.
I don't know what my future holds or who I'll choose to love me
But I can tell you where I'm from and who loved me to life
Did Jon even care? Would he be so willing to leave me because of work or some stupid bullshit like that? I understood on most days, but this was different. Dan was helping me right now, not Jon.
And so it is a part of my
courageous plan to leave
With a broken heart
Tucked away under my sleeve
I finally landed. I hadn't really thought any of this out. How would I make it the rest of the way? ... Just walk. I rushed out of the crowded area, into the streets after I retrieved my stuff. I still hadn't cried, but I wanted to, in a way, to relieve my pain.
I wanna go home for Christmas
Let me go home this year
I wanna go home for Christmas
Let me go home this year
Knock, knock, knock. Who would want to bother me at this hour? It's so late. I was crying. I want you home this year, Jon.
"Who is it?" I shouted at the door, my voice coming out as an angry growl.
"Arin, it's me. Please let me in," I recognized his voice immediately, and ran to the door to fling it open.
"God, Jon," I sniffled, throwing myself into him, "Oh God, I've missed you so, so much. Baby, what are you doing here?"
"I wanted to be home for Christmas," Jon smiled, picking me up, cradling me in his arms.
"I love you so much," I cried in sheer joy, cuddling closer to him, like a child.
"Am I allowed to move in?" Jon asked me, only making me happier.
"Come in right now. And stay," I beamed up at him. I could barley make out his face with the dim lights outside. He stepped in, still holding me tightly. I noticed that he, too, was crying.
"I've missed you," Jon whispered, collapsing on my couch.
"Merry Christmas," I uttered. We spent the night on the couch, hugging and kissing each other.
