You know I did love my life for a while then I got faced with 3 people who I really loved but I had to choose one I accidentally chose one and fucked up the other 2 I guess that's all I can ever do in life I think I'm doing something good but then I get kicked in the face with reality saying I fucked up badly so yeah I may seem happy but I'm not and nobody notices this until I tell them because I want to keep it a secret so that I don't hurt them too because when I do tell them my secret I hurt them badly that's the only thing I can accomplish in life feeling good then realizing that I keep fucking people up. I don't feel like I should do this so I don't I try to help them and it works but my way of helping is me taking the pain from them and locking it inside me until I can't take it so I give it to somebody else and fuck them up that's all I can do I guess pretend to help then fuck up
