* so I had an idea for a book but before I could write it I needed to write what happened before which has resulted in this story which will be Book one followed by another book which will take place years later with some of the same people. I'm not sure how long this book will be but I hope you like it even though its just setting up for what's to come in the second book.
Chapter one
I have never loved anyone ....I'm not even sure if I'd know how to
People think it's impossible to not love anyone....you would think I at least love my parents,but I don't. I wanted to...I wanted to love my mom so bad,and I wanted her to love me, but we don't always get what we want. Ever since I can remember I've been getting yelled at my first memory was me being three and not picking up one toy and my mom screaming at the top of her lungs calling me a stupid ungreatful brat. That might not sound bad but I was only three and as I got older the yelling continued and got worse I was constantly verbally abused getting called everything from a bitch to a bastard child that no one could ever love, and then my mom met Darrell. From the start they're relationship was abusive and it didn't take long before in was thrown on me. If I didn't do something he liked I'd get smacked in the face, if he asked me a question and I didn't answer fast enough Id get a punch to the ribs, if I did answer his questions I'd get kicked for "talking back". My
mom never gave a shit when he beat me she thought it was funny as long as it wasn't her. I hated my life and I hated them but there wasn't much I could do because I was only 12 at the time and then when I turned 16 all hell broke lose. I was finally able to get a job and buy things I wanted which included clothes I was comfortable in .,,.guys clothes. I knew the reaction I would get from my mom and her boyfriend wouldn't be good but I would've never imagined how bad it would be. I got home from the mall with my one and only friend Destiny and went in the house ....Darrell was sitting in front of the TV like always "where the hell you been" he said without breaking eye contact with the tv I tried to speed walk to my room and avoid him but that's when my mom came through the hall and stop midstride when she saw me. " oh my god you're a dyke" she screamed and that caused Darrell turned around and his eyes widened. I was only wearing cargo shorts and a hoodie, and I knew I shouldn't wear them in the house but the clothes my mom had given me were old and had holes and they were pretty much unwearable. That next hour was the worst hour of my life my mom had always been verbally abusive but she hardly ever hit me but it all changed that night. When my mom asked me if I was gay I didn't give her answer, the truth was I did love women and I was gay and I've always known but I couldn't tell her for fear of what she would do, but because I bought guy clothes my cover was blown. My mom slapped me straight in the face and had this look of complete disgust on her face, "get the fuck out of my house you fag "she sneered I turned around ready to run and that's when I ran into Darrell and I knew it was all over, he beat me like never before and after what seemed like years I was able to get out of the house. I ran down the street blood dripping down my face, I felt like I was going to pass out because Darrell hit me so many times against the head. I cut through some yards and got to my destination.....Destiny's house. I had told her about the situation I was but she didn't know how bad it was, so when she opened her door when I banged on it a look of terror spread across her face. "Oh my god!! Sage!!" she cried out "dez please don't say anything can I come in and clean up" I asked. Dez looked like she was about to burst out in tears and I felt bad because I didn't want her to see me like this. Dez was my only friend people tended to stay away from because I didn't look like everyone else. I always had terrible clothes and bruises and I guess I just didn't give off a good vibe. For the next hour I cleaned myself up, while trying to think of what to do. I needed a place to stay, but I didn't want to ask Dez because she lived with her older brother and they house they had was really small. Dez parents had died in an accident when she was little and Paul her brother had moved them. When I came to the living room Dez was was sitting there phone in hand " we are calling my brother and then going down to the police station" she stated
