Friend of darkness

Chapter 2

Sam

"Adriana, do you know where my sister is?" I asked as I wiggled my backpack straps off, set it on the ground and take the small circle seat next to her.

"No. She wasn't here when I came." She said not bothering to look up from her phone. "The one day I get to school early and Annora isn't even there? Should I text her? No... she probably overslept again, I'll probably see her during passing periods."

***

All day I didn't see her. "Did I miss her? No." It's not that hard to tell her apart from others. Light brown hair that fades into a blonde, wavy/curly, blue eyes, sweater and sweat pants, her Alice In Wonderland backpack. "Did she get a new one?" No. She'd never go anywhere without it. I'm surprised it hasn't even ripped after all these years. Annoras grandmother gave it to her. I don't know what's so special about it, all that's on there is little Alice is looking up into a tree not much taller than her, on one of the branches rests a big, fat cuddly kitty, with a long smile and on the bottom left hand corner is the quote, "But I don't want to go among mad people said Alice, Oh you can't help that said the cat, We're all mad here." I never really understood it, and every time I asked Annora what it meant she always said, "You'll find out. Soon.", and still to this day, I don't get it.

***

When I got home my aunt and uncle were drunk...again. Luckily my bedroom is in the basement, but that doesn't stop her from coming down.

"How was...woah...your day?" My aunt asks trying to find her balance.

"It was good." I say keeping a straight face.

"Well, sorry, actually not... but Annora's grandparents called to let you know... that she's in the... hospital." She said with no emotion as she finally grabs hold of the railing to the stairs able to regain her balance. "You selfish, heartless bitch".

"Did they say why?" I didn't want to bother asking, cause who knew what story she'd make up to keep me away from her, but she's my sister so of course it would be instinct.

"All they said was that she's in the ICU," She started wobbling again.

"Okay, well i'm going to do my homework". I say looking at her, waiting for whatever comes next.

Nothing. She said and did nothing. Thats unusual. Usually she'd scream at me saying I'm trying to be better than them, she'd tell me I should be getting my ugly-fat ass out of bed and go workout with her or she'd snap and hit me. But there was none of that. Maybe she was actually effected by the phone call, but who knew? I had other things to worry about right now.

***

It took me a while to find Annora. I went to the hospital in our town and the nurse kept saying they didn't have anyone under the name of Annora White, but I was sure I was at the right hospital, and it was kind of hard seeing how her grandparents didn't leave an address and I wasn't going to call them up and ask. The nurse finally told me to sit down and someone would come to talk to me, so while I was waiting I saw her kitty calendar and realized it was thursday and I forgot that Annora goes to those meeting things on wednesday.

I got up from the chair and and walked out to the parking lot where I got in my car and drove to Schaumburg. It was only a thirty minute drive and thankfully there was no traffic.

I went through the sliding glass doors, and marched up to the nurses.

"Can I help you?" A nurse in blue scrubs and bright blonde hair asks.

"I'm here for my sister Annora White, can you tell me what room she's in?" I say a bit angrily.

She types away at her computer, the sound of her nails tapping the keys sound like rain drops on a tin roof. "Sorry, but there's no one here under that name? Are you at the right hospital?" She says, interrupting my thoughts and her face plastered with pityness. Typical.

"Yes I'm sure! I don't know anywhere else she'd fucking go!"

"Ma'am please calm down." She says standing up.

"Just look again." I say pointing at her computer screen.

"Ok." she says sitting back down.

"No, sorry. No one is showing up under that name."

"What the fuck!" I say under my breath.

Then I remember that our stupid, cheap insurance we have through our mother never changed her last name.

"Do you have anyone under Annora Bultink?" I ask her.

She stares at me for a couple of seconds, her eyebrows furrowed, then she starts typing away at her computer again and looks up at me. "We do, she's in room four." She points to the left and I'm on my way.

***

When I came into the room, the doctor was there checking up on Annoras feeding tube and vitals. He also explained to me that she was in a coma because someone ran a stoplight and hit her.

When he left the room I grabbed the seat to the right and scooted it right beside her bed. I sat there for a long time just studying her. Her skin was pale white, light brown, barely noticeable freckles scattered on her nose, chin and forehead. Her long and naturally curled eyelashes and her perfectly light brown shaped eyebrows. Then her hair. Naturally curled ombre soft hair, that cupped her face. It's funny how she'd always complain about her hair. It'd always be too thick, too dark, or too short! Her freaking hair was down to the middle of her back! Too short my ass! The only thing missing, her beautiful, electrifying, ocean blue eyes. They were now covered, and lost in the dark and before I knew it I started crying. I cupped my face with my hands, and rested my head on her chest.

I probably cried for ten minutes straight. When I leaned over to grab a tissue from the little table, her hand fell off the edge of the bed and when I sat back down I picked it up and saw her arms.

I rubbed my hand over the cuts, and kissed them all. They had gone all the way up and both arms and stopped right before her bone that stuck up on her shoulder. I couldn't believe she was still cutting. She should've been happy and getting better. She was with her grandparents who took good care of her, she was going to therapy and those meetings. Why? Why, what was so bad?

I put her arm gently back on the bed and under her blanket. Hopefully her grandparents didn't see. They never knew she cut, and she never wanted to tell them.

I was getting up to go to the bathroom when my foot hit something hard under her bed. I pushed the chair back, got on my knees and bent down to pull out her backpack. When I pulled it out from underneath to bring it up on top of the bed, it got caught on something and crashed on the floor, the sound echoing throughout the room. I bring the backpack up and pull out a purple, pink, and blue galaxy journal. I never seen it before, but I open it and scan through the pages.

They all start the same way with the month, day and year. Some of them she writes to grandma donna, and other times she just writes about what happened that day or her feelings.

I knew I shouldn't be reading her journal, but I couldn't help it. So I flipped to the last entry and began reading.

December 4th, 2015

I didn't wake up on time to day. Again. I don't really mind. It gives me an excuse for not eating breakfast, and for dressing up in my "lazy clothes" as my grandparents call them.

Lately my grandparents have been asking me how I am lately, and it's getting really annoying. I don't know why I feel the way I do. I just do. I think it's because the memories have been showing up more. I try to push them out and do what my therapist told me to do. I try to do the things I wrote myself on the list, eat a brownie, make flowers, read one of my favorite books by Sarah Dessen, organize my room, but none of those things seem to be working. My mind just keeps making up excuses not to do them. And it doesn't help the fact that we have family come over on the weekends who we haven't seen in a couple of years, and all they bother to do is ask how my dad is doing, and then my sisters. But none of them ask me how I'm doing. And when I tell this to my therapist she asks me how am I doing, and of course I lie. I can't help it. I know if I tell her that I'm doing terrible, and that I've gone back to cutting she'll send me away. But I don't want to go back to the hospital. It never works. Nothing works, and I hate it.