Spreading the Funny

Pick up lines that tell you to run for the hills

*******WARNING******** Use at your own risk

Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?

Do I know you? Cause you look a lot like my next girlfriend.

I've just moved you to the top of my 'to do' list.

Do you know karate? Cause your body's kickin!

Do you think I'm cute or should I come back after you've had a few more drinks?

You must be Jamaican, because Jamaican me crazy.

Do you work for UPS? I could have sworn I saw you checking out my package.

Was your Dad a baker? Because you've got a nice set of buns.

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together.

If you were words on a page, you'd be what they call FINE print.

Can I buy you a drink, or do you just want the money?

If you were a chicken, you'd be impeccable.

You know your body is made up of 90% water, and I’m thirsty.

If you were a booger I would pick you first.

On a scale of 1-10...how much fun are we gonna have on our first date?

You might as well sleep with me because I'm going to tell everybody we did it anyway.

Baby did you fart, 'cause you blow me away!

Don't you know me from somewhere?

Hey, somebody farted. Let's get out of here.

Say, didn't we go to different schools together?

Excuse me, does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

Do you have any raisins? No? How about a date?

Do you work for UPS? I could have sworn I saw you checking out my package.

You look like my third wife! (How many have you had?) Two.

Life without you would be like a broken pencil... pointless.

Are you from Tennessee? Cause you're the only ten I see.

Hi. I suffer from amnesia. Do I come here often?

Girl, you must be a tater tot, cuz you're Orida!

If you where my homework, I’d do you on the table.

All this could be yours for one low, low price!

Are your parents retarded?…because you look special.

If this bar is a meat market, you must be the prime rib.

I'm like chocolate pudding; I look like crap but I’m as sweet as can be.

If you were a screen door I'd slam you all night long.

If you were a library book, I would check you out.

Hi, the voices in my head told me to come over and talk to you.

This may sound funny, but you're so hot that you made me forget my pickup line.