Fix You (Larry Stylinson AU)

Chapter 5

🚨I'm gonna put a trigger warning for this chapter, and pretty much for the rest of the story. So if you are trying to avoid any type of triggering things for self harm, then I suggest you don't read this chapter.🚨

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I nearly dropped the paper bags about four times on the way up the stairs to the apartment, there's so much shit in here. We eat way too much.

Once I finally get up to our floor I can hear Louis' music blaring from our place, Pierce the Veil, he's in a bad mood. If he doesn't turn it down then our neighbors are going to flip shit.

After several tries, I finally get the door open and step inside, setting the bags on the kitchen counter before searching for him.

"Louis?" I walk into his room, he's not there. I check my room too, not there either. The music gets turned up louder, it's coming from the bathroom. What is he doing in there?

"Louis?" I call again, knocking on the bathroom door. "Louis are you okay?"

Nothing.

This time I knock louder, more frantically. "Louis? Louis you're scaring me. If you don't open this door I'm opening it myself."

Nothing.

What the fuck is going on? I'm really worried. "Louis. I'm coming in now." I try opening the door and it's locked. Fuck. "Louis, open the fucking door!" I bang on the door, panicking. I run into the kitchen, looking for anything that I can use to pry the door open. After searching through the drawers like a maniac, I find a hammer. Good enough.

"Louis if you don't open this door in 5 seconds, I'm beating it down." The music gets turned up louder.

"Five

four

three..

two..

one."

I nearly scream. He's not going to open this door, so I will. I slam the hammer into the door as hard as I can. Realizing that making a big hole in the middle of the door isn't going to do me any good, I aim for the doorknob, hitting it with all of my might until it breaks off. I slam my body into the door until it flies open, revealing a terrifying sight.

Louis is sitting on the floor, wearing only boxers. Blood stained boxers. There's several razor blades scattered across the floor. His arms and thighs are dripping with blood. He stares at me with distant eyes.

"Oh my god. Louis!" I rush over to him and drop down to me knees to reach his level. "Louis are you okay? What happened? Louis talk to me!" I frantically shake his shoulders and he seems to snap out of it. He stares at me for a second and then bursts out into tears, apologizing over and over again between sobs.

"No no, don't apologize. Calm down Louis, it's okay. It's all going to be okay. You have to tell me what happened, okay? What led you to do this?" I stand up to wet some towels to clean him up. I'm so fucking worried right now, there's so much blood and I can't tell if the cuts are deep enough to do any fatal damage. I shudder at the thought. He can't die. He can't leave me. I sit back down next to him and gently take his left arm and lay the warm, damp towel on it. There's so much blood. "Louis, you need to tell me what happened, okay? Please tell me." He tries his best to stop crying and I gently rub his shoulder in attempt to calm him.

Once he catches his breath, he finally speaks. "I-I just..I just got really upset and I didn't know what else to do I..I'm so sorry Harry." He's on the verge of crying again, but he keeps himself from falling apart.

"What made you so upset?" I say as calmly as I can manage.

He looks down. "The f-front office called earlier and I was just thinking about how I c-can't.." He stops himself mid sentence.

"Can't what, Louis? You can tell me." I remove the towel from his arm and examine his cuts. They aren't very deep, I think he will be okay, physically, at least.

He turns to look at me, his face displays so much pain. I can't stand to see him this way, and I know he hates talking about his social anxiety.

"I know. It's okay, it's all going to be alright. I promise."

He hates how he can't just have a simple phone call with someone without freaking out. There's lots if things he can't do without trouble.

He continues his pained, lifeless gaze at me.

"Can you promise me something too, Louis?" I ask, grabbing the second towel, laying it on his other bleeding arm.

"Sure." It looks like that took all of his energy to get out. He looks so tired. He needs to rest.

"Can you promise me that you will try you're best to never do this again?"

He slowly nods his head.

"Good. I don't want you to do this to yourself. You don't deserve it. Ever. You're perfect. Okay? I know you don't believe that about yourself, but please believe me when I say that. Okay?"

He starts to tear up again, his eyes with a slight glimpse of hope.

"Okay?" I ask again.

"Okay." He says with a little more life.

We stare at each other for a long moment. Then, I slowly lean into him and press my lips against his. I wait for a reaction from him, seeing if he will pull away. When he doesn't, I slowly move my lips against his, my hand going up to the back of his neck, pulling him closer to me.

I pull back and search his face for a reaction. It shows a mixture of surprise and..relief?

"Was..was that okay?" I half whisper.

He brings his lips back to mine in response. This time his hand goes to my arm, squeezing it. The kiss is desperate, from the both of us.

After what seems like an eternity, I finally pull back, attempting to stand up. But Louis' small hands stop me.

"Don't leave," he cries out.

"I'm not. I was going to bring us out of this bathroom. You need a more..peaceful place to be in." I take his hand and help him up off of the cold floor. "Louis?"

He stares down at the mess on the floor. All of the blood, tissues, and razor blades.

"Louis?" I ask again.

"Yes?" He slowly turns back to face me.

"I..love you." Relief flows through me. And worry. Worry for what he's going to say back. He's not saying anything..

"L-Louis?"

Stepping forward, he takes my hands and looks up at me.

"I love you too." His face flushes and he looks down.

I tilt his chin up so that he's looking at me. "You do?"

He nods his head.

"I don't mean like a friend. I mean like, more than friends. I'm in love with you. I've loved you for as long as I can remember..I just never told you because, well, I don't know..."

"Harry" he interrupts me.

"Yes?"

"I love you too" He smiles up at me and takes both of my hands into his small ones.

I smile back. "Let's get out of this bathroom. Okay?"

"Okay"

"Oh wait. But first, lets get you cleaned up." I walk back to the tub and run the water.

~

Longer chapter this time.

Does anyone like it? P l e a s e let me know. I feel like I'm writing for a brick wall. Just comment and tell me how you like it. Thanks!