I remember the time when I went to visit you, and I walked in to see Sanghyuk crying. The door had been unlocked, and I was concerned, because even though the two of you could be forgetful, you'd never forget to lock the door. Sanghyuk's phone was on the ground, and it was clearly mid-call, but the boy was sobbing into his hands. And the caller ID scared the life out of me.
Neither of you guys seemed to be sick, so my heart stopped when I read the words 'Doctor Jung' on the screen. I thought that something had happened to you, and the thought itself scared me.
I tried to get an answer out of Sanghyuk, but he was choking on his own tears, whispering your name over and over again. I remember frantically asking him what happened to you, but he refused to respond.
To this day, I still don't know what went on.
The next day, you were back to normal, all smiley and bubbly and happy.
But something was wrong.
I didn't know what it was, but there was something about the smile on your face that was just different.
When I asked about it, you told me not to worry. You told me that you were fine.
I wish I knew then that you weren't fine, and in a way beyond emotions.
But I didn't ask further questions, I just nodded and hugged you, and I swore that out of the corner of my eye, I saw a single tear running down your cheek.
I swore that I saw you break.
But I didn't ask, because I respected your privacy.
I still remember how excited I was the next day, when I realized that I liked you. I was a naïve kid who believed that love came with happy endings, and the moment I realized my sprouting feelings for you, I told you straight away, stumbling over my words, even though I wasn't completely sure that I even liked you in that way.
I think they call it a crush because of the crushing feeling that comes after love.
I swore that I saw something apologetic in your eyes. Your usually bright eyes were glossy, almost as if you were going to cry, but you smiled and accepted.
And now I know what the apologetic look in your eyes meant.
You were trying to apologize in advance for the pain that came after the joy of loving you.
If only I knew then.
YOU ARE READING
LOVE LETTER.
Fanfiction〝 It's okay, though. In this life, I'll learn to live without you. 〞 Unspoken words of fondness and affection serve as the worst form of karma when the boy who paints grey skies into red sunsets greets the looming face of death too soon, and Wonshik...
