I thought back to the dream... now she was something to look at!
Such dark thick hair and water blue eyes... she moved with such grace...
I didn't realise I was day dreaming until the bell went, I jumped out of my skin, I was the only one left in the huge school hall.
-Last lesson, I'd finished the set work within ten minutes, that's the only thing remotely special about me, I'm smart, I don't tend to show it though, well even If I did no one would notice...
I was staring out the window as the supply teacher read the paper, it was getting dark early these days, the sun was just about setting the sky was a breath taking red colour...
That dream kept popping into my mind, the girl, I bet she was smart, her eyes had that kind of depth, y'know? Again I didn't notice what time it was until the bell went for the end of school.
I grabbed my bag, putting my work on the desk as I left class.
-Sitting in bed that night, I'd got home at around four, taking the long route home. I shoved something in the microwave for supper, I ate it quickly and got to my homework, Mom hadn't spoke to me at all since I came in she just sat staring out the window tears strolling down her cheeks.
I'd always wondered why she hated me It wasn't until I was thirteen that my grandmother told me on her death bed, I can feel the tears coming as I remember that ghastly scene...
I stood there at the edge of her hospital bed while my mother was on the chair weeping my grandmother was stroking her hair absently her eyes focused on me, I'd never liked her that much, she'd never paid much attention to me, like everyone else in the family.
"Anne, leave me and violet to talk for a moment please" I looked confused I was Violet and why did she want to talk to me? Regardless my mother left the room, "Violet, I know we've never been very close but there is something I want you to know before I leave this world..." I nodded as my throat began to hurt " First of all I love you..." I stared in disbelief no one had ever said to that to me...
"...and that's why I have to tell you how you were conceived, your mother wasn't always the tight lipped girl she is now..."
NO! I screamed in my thoughts I would not re-live this experience!
I sat on the edge of my bed...and I cried, I cried because of everything, because I knew my mother hated me, because I knew I had never been anything but a burden and because, because... I hated myself for what I was...
She was beautiful
And so was he...
He stood beside the dark haired beauty, his skin was as pale as hers, his eyes a shocking emerald green, so much like the small child who stood in font of him his arm was round her, the other around the small boy, hers was around him and the small girl with long black curls such as hers... they all stared at me... he opened his mouth to speak...
My eyes flew open.
Somewhere amongst the tears I must have fallen asleep, I looked at my alarm clock, 3 am, "Darn it" I muttered and walked over to my bedroom window the moon was full, the stars were twinkling, such a beautiful sight.
I headed to the en-suite bathroom, I needed to shower, the water was therapeutic.
Half an hour later I was drying my hair when I heard a soft whimpering sound I crept out of my bedroom and followed the sound to the door of my mothers room, I knocked lightly, "come in" she croaked.
I slowly walked to her side and leaned down to hug her, for as long as I can remember we'd never touched, I suppose we must have at one point...,
She hugged me back, I felt my mouth pop open in shock but she didn't seem to notice the small noise, her crying had stopped and we were both sitting on bed, both of us wept.
I don't know how long we cried, how long I held her in my arms, but the next thing I knew rays of sun were tickling my face, she was gone, I was lying on her double bed alone.
Her bathroom door was open, I was sure it hadn't been when I came in. I picked myself up off the bed and cautiously walked over to it... what if there were robbers? I laughed at myself for thinking such a stupid thing, as I opened the door a curious dripping sound met me, I looked in expecting to see the tap dripping. There lay my mother, her face too pale to describe, one of her wrists were slung over the side of the bathtub she lay in, it was red, and blood dripped from it....
