Runaways

Chapter Two

I woke up to the sound of birds singing. I mimicked them as Katelynn slept. It was the first time I woke up to find her still with me. Usually she would've left by now. I remember one day i was in class, as always i was just messing around not paying attention to a word the teacher was saying. I was talking to Katelynn. She told me to draw her. Some people say i'm whipped because i literally do everything she tells me to. The way i see it, i'm just trying to make the person i love happy. But anyways i did, i never gave it to her. From time to time when i have nothing to do i end up drawing her. This was one of those times.

She was starting to wake up just as i was finishing, in a slight panic i threw it out as fast as i could. " Good morning sunshine, or should i say afternoon?" " Shut up i went to bed late last night cause' someone didn't want to stop to rest till 2 o'clock in the morning" I smirked at her, she hated that, or so she says. " Your lucky i love you or i would punch that smirk off your face." I couldn't help but laugh, not the best idea, she punched me on the shoulder " Dumbass" " Love you too Katelynn" " shut up" " get dressed we are going out. I'll be downstairs."

I went down to the lobby of the hotel we were staying at. It was a small one, but then again i can't afford much After a couple of minutes Katelynn showed up, she glanced at my hair, i've never really been one to take time to fix my hair, i would just put a hat on it and done, but i forgot my hat on the way out to get Katelynn so my hair was a mess. She took out her brush and began to play with my hair, in the middle of the lobby. " Katelynn people are staring" " do i look like i care?" She turned around and yelled " Yes i'm brushing his hair do you have a problem with that hmm?" The front desk lady gave us a rather dirty look and that set Katelynn off real good " oh so you do have a problem!" "Katelynn!!" " Ryder i got this" she spoke with confidence, but i couldn't risk it. I picked her up and carried her out probably pissing her off at me more than she already was but for added effect i thought i'd yell " Have a nice day!" Sure enough she didn't speak to me the entire car ride. she was not happy.

God she really knows how to push my buttons sometimes, but for some reason no matter what she does i can't seem to find a reason to stop loving her. We hadn't driven too far the day before we were just outside Virginia. I took Katelynn down to this waffle house everyone would talk about back home. Well it wasn't home anymore. I would never go back. The waitress we were given spoke with an accent. She walked over to us with elegance, for a waffle house, that was a bit unusual. She looked familiar to me. The natural straight Blonde hair, her Brown eyes, those lips. I shook it off it was impossible, it couldn't be her. "hello my name is Anna i will be your server today can start you with something to drink?" "Ryder, you're staring" i hadn't realized it, but i was staring. The sound of my name puzzled the waitress, she stood silent. "Yeah i'll have a.." She was gone. She left pretty quickly, i was pretty confused myself, i hadn't notice Katelynn talking to me "should we just go?" I finally recognized her. Anna. She had changed. I still wasn't paying any attention to Katelynn. " Ryder?" "yeah yeah coffee is fine" "coffee? Ryder what the hell is wrong with you?" I snapped out of it. It's best i forget her anyway. " Sorry, i was, ah, having a moment there. yeah let's go" " who was that?" " i don't know" i lied. I didn't want to get into it. I spent so long trying to forget about Anna. I wasn't about to bring all those feelings back. Besides i was in love with Katelynn, that i knew for sure. " we have to go back and get our stuff." " why don't we stay here for a little while? I mean it's nice here." " i guess we could stay a little longer." "And you know,it'd be really great,If you,Bought me..." "What do you want now?" She smiled at me. I have this bad habit of buying her everything......that i can afford that is. " we can go later." I was anxious to get back to the hotel and get the hell outta there, one more day wouldn't hurt.

We got back to the hotel around 1:30. I was pretty much exhausted at this point. i walked into the room, threw myself on my bed, and passed out. at least that's what i hope would've happened. i found myself staring at the ceiling, thinking about,well, Katelynn of course . God i loved Katelynn. it killed me inside, it really did. i've never wanted someone more my entire life. not even Anna, well i did end up with Anna, but, nevermind forget i mentioned that. where was i? oh yeah Katelynn. I've never felt this way about someone before in my life. have i said that before? maybe, but i mean it. it's completely different from the way i felt about Anna, or even Ariana. I could find a reason to stop feeling the way i did about Anna and with Ari, but no matter what Katelynn does to me, nothing, absolutely nothing will make me stop loving Katelynn.

Sometimes my feelings for Katelynn can get a little, well out of hand. There have been times where i'm with Katelynn, and i don't know, but something gets me. whether it be jealousy over something very fucking stupid, or just being with her and thinking about how much i love her, how much i would love to just, even if it was for one night, have her be mine. just mine. and it would kill me to the point where i'd have to leave her, because i can't handle it. i don't think she understands exactly how much pain she causes me, quite honestly i'd rather keep it that way. i don't want her feeling bad because i was stupid enough to fall in love with her. yes, re-read that as many times as you want, i'm feel stupid for falling in love with her. Sometimes i hate myself for it. i wish i could just love her in the way she loves me. I was pretty much considering leaving Katelynn, i was overwhelmed with my own thoughts, i needed to leave. But from past experience, i know that is not the best idea.

After about what seemed like an eternity (which only turned out to be twenty minutes) i got up, i felt like i was going insane. Katelynn was in the shower so i went out for a walk. Not one of my best ideas considering i had no idea exactly where i was going nor where i was. Virginia? No we were definitely out of Virginia by now. I kept walking, i was completely lost by now. "You dumbass you scared the shit out of me" "jesus Katelynn? When did you, how did you find me?" " i't doesn't matter how i found you scared the shit out of me. Never do that again" "i'm sorry i needed to walk, alone,how the hell did you find me anyway?" " I saw the direction you were walking in from the window, then i pretty much winged it." " oh well i'll see you back at the hotel." " i'm not going back without you, i'll walk with you.""I'll see you back at the hotel" "you think i'm going back without you, i'm walking with you." "I'd rather you not." "So you're gonna scare the shit out of me by leaving without telling me and you expect me to just leave you? Hell no i'm coming with you" she was really pist at me i could, but i really couldn't tell why. "Why do you care so much?" "Because I love you Ryder." Loved me, like she knows how much i love her and how much it tortures me on a daily "like you know about love" oh shit. Have you ever had one of those moments where you think out loud and instantly regret it, this was one of those moments. " excuse me? You think i don't love you?" " I didn't mean it that wa.." " you think you don't mean a lot to me? After everything you've done for me you think i don't love you." "Katelynn i.." " and all the shit i have to deal with with you, you're always leaving, you never want to be around me, i get i can be a bitch but cmon" " you have no idea why i try to leave, you have no idea why i do the things i do." Now i was getting mad I wasn't even thinking at this point. I was pretty sure i was gonna end up saying something i shouldn't but i couldn't control myself. " why do you do it than Ryder? Cause i sure as hell can't figure it out." " because i Love you. How's that one for you? How's the fact that every time i'm around you i slowly die inside because of how much i love you, you don't understand how much it kills me." I needed to stop talking but i just couldn't it was already out " that's why i leave that's why I do everything i do Katelynn because i'm in love with you. I'm so in love with you i can't even believe it myself. And it's fucking killing me inside i-i..." I felt her reach over and kiss me, she kissed me. I kissed her back. We were kissing for so long but i didn't care. "Did you honestly think i didn't feel the same way?" I didn't say anything, i was surprised, happy, i couldn't believe it. Could this actually be real? "Ryder?...Ryder? Ryder wake up....RYDER!"

Turns out i actually could fall asleep. Katelynn grabbed the blanket from under me and i fell to the floor "ow, bitch what the hell what?" "Ice cream time?" She gave me an innocent smile, i tried to hide my disappointment, i was back to where i started, she doesn't feel the same way. " Dammit Katelynn, you couldn't have waited till i woke up?" "You've been sleeping for three hours, i couldn't wait any longer."

Kill me.
The only two words running through my head. If only someone could kill me. If only i hadn't been so goddamn stupid to fall in love with her. I have nothing left in my life but this undying love, it kills me day after day, one of these days it's gonna end me. My only fear is if that if it ends me it will end her too because without me she has nothing, i'd rather suffer for the rest of my goddamn life than to have her suffer one minute. That's really the only thing keeping alive.

"Give me a minute." I got up from the floor and looked at the time. It was getting close to four and we still hadn't eaten anything. "Why don't we eat something firs..." "MEXICAN" ".......Mexican?" "Yes, i want tortillas." "Okay Mexican it is!" I swear if this doesn't kill me, i'm going to be broke by the end of it.