Zoe’s POV
It’d been a week since I left London. A week since Alfie had left me on that Platform. A week since I broke his heart. We hadn’t spoken since, I’d tried to text him and call him a couple of times but with no answer, and a series on his tweets indirected straight at me, a decided he needed space despite the fact I so desperately wanted him. Ever since that day, my mind was set on the fact I liked Alfie and no matter how much I tried to tell myself I didn’t…I really did. It was now so much worst now though, I was pretty sure Alfie hated me after I blew him off so distinctively, he’d never be mine now.
“Typical me, wanting something I can’t have”
I mocked to myself under my breath as I stepped onto my train that had just pulled into the small rural station. I was heading up to Northampton to spend a few days with Louise, Matt and of course little Darcy. I haven’t told Louise about the Alfie situation yet, unsure of whether I would or not. If I was to tell anyone, it would be Louise but I just wasn’t sure whether I wanted to. I was hoping to spend this time with three of my favourite people and have a nice, welcome distraction.
///
“Zo-eh!”
Hearing Darcy’s familiar attempts at saying my name, I reached down into her buggy to lift her out and snuggle her into my arms, having missed her being there to automatically put a smile on my face. She grinned up at me, hitting her head against my shoulder as she laughed at the face I pulled at her, puffing out my cheeks.
We spent that night just staying in Louise’s house, eating a pizza on the garden patio whilst Matt ran around the grass with Darcy, letting her get the most of the evening sunshine.
It was a Friday night meaning both Alfie and Marcus had new videos coming out that evening. I really wanted to watch them as soon as they were up as with them both “malfie” collab videos, meaning there would be double the amount of Alfie. I just needed to see his face; I hadn’t gone a week without as much as speaking to him for so long, it didn’t feel right.
As Matt fed Darcy her supper, having finally calmed her down from running around the garden, Louise called me into the Dining Room with Marcus’s new video up on her laptop screen.
“Hellooooo”
Marcus’ signature line was quickly followed by a very lack lustre Alfie popping up beside him and quietly addressing the audience:
“What’s up guys!”
As the video continued there was a clear divide between Marcus’ effort and energy input compared to Alfie’s. His voice was monotone and weak, his face looking tired as his hair lay flat to his head having not bothered to do anything to it. I was surprised Marcus hadn’t noticed or quizzed Alfie, sure that if he did know the truth they wouldn’t be filming these videos. Louise’s face grew a concerned expression as we continued onto Alfie’s video, a very similar situation in this one just with Alfie putting in a tiny bit more effort as it was his audience he was filming for this time. I hated the fact that I knew it was me doing this to Alfie, and there was nothing I could do to speak to him.
“Zoe do you know what’s wrong with Alfie? If you don’t, go ring him…I’m worried!”
Louise spoke with a sense of urgency in her voice as she slammed down on the pause button of the video, not bothering to watch anymore. I delayed my response, knowing that I couldn’t ring Alfie as he wouldn’t answer yet unsure that he would answer to Louise following my tweet that I was at her house. My response was obviously alot more delayed than I had thought as when I came out of my thoughts; it turned out Louise was already in the kitchen with her phone to her ear as she spoke to Alfie.
///
Later that evening, after I settled Darcy down to sleep following her insisting I read her a story, I headed back into the lounge to find Louise on the sofa with a giant Cheshire cat grin spread across her face.
“What you found?” I asked inquisitively, noticing that it was something filling up her macbook screen that was causing her excitement.
“This was in my tumblr tags…I love it!”
She turned the screen to face me, three people smiling for a photograph filling it. The photo was of me, Louise and Alfie from the previous autumn when we had held a small meet up in Louise’s local park area. I’d remembered seeing the picture months ago yet only now, after recent events, was I beginning to notice several little things in it. My eyes focused straight away on Alfie’s reasonably tight grip on my waist on he leaned into me for the picture. A few weeks ago this would have meant nothing to me but now my heart and mind was racing as I wished Alfie was here right now.
“Oh and by the way, that reminds me…when I was on the phone to Alfie earlier-”
She imminently caught my attention with this, wondering what they spoke about on the phone. I was almost completely sure Alfie hadn’t told her what had happened between us because she hadn’t mentioned anything to me about it and I was pretty sure she would have. Then realising I was beginning to zone out again, Louise waved her hand in front of my face before continuing.
“So yeah on the phone I arranged with Alfie for him to come up and look after Darcy with you as me and Matt have that posh family dinner party thing tomorrow night.”
“Why can’t I look after her myself?”
“You can Zo, I just thought Alfie could do with the space from whatever was bothering him..plus Darcy loves it when you two play with her together”
“And he actually wanted to come up with me here?”
I quickly wanted to retract this comment, praying Louise wouldn’t think too much into it. Yet she never got a chance to reply as she left the room to answer the knock at her front door. The same three knock rhythm that he always did.
That Alfie always did.
