The Cowgirl Rides Away (Bluebonnet, TX Book 1)

CHAPTER SEVEN: Jessa

After oversleeping, I'd still managed to meet my cab and be at the airport on time. I needed a day in Salt Lake to shop for some non-western, girly stuff, but Zack hadn't needed to know that. Wednesday morning I'd fly on to San Antonio.

I hated myself for lying to Zack yet again. He'd been so nice when I'd gotten upset that I'd had to scramble for an excuse. Getting fired was as close as I could come to the truth. I'd probably go to hell for all my lies, lies I'd have to straighten out-preferably sooner rather than later. I could only hope that he'd understand that I'd wanted someone who wanted me for me, not my name or my fame or my gold buckles.

I was missing my last week of therapy. I suppose that would only get me to hell that much faster. But what the hell was I supposed to do? Sit in my house and rot?

I shopped at a strip center near my hotel that included a bunch of clothing stores and a Bath and Body Works, where only the logistical nightmare of carrying a suitcase full of bubble bath and lotion halfway across the country stopped me from buying out the whole store.

And I discovered something new about myself. I love to shop. I'd just never really had the time to indulge myself before. It felt funny doing what I wanted without worrying who might see me and give me hell about it.

Habit had me wandering into A. A. Callisters-like I needed more western clothes. I left empty-handed after spotting one of my Revolution Jeans posters on the wall. You could see my nipples, for crying out loud! I looked as if my face would crack if I smiled-what you could see of my face under the too-large hat. I'd forgotten how much I hated those posters.

I pushed thoughts of my former career out of my mind and focused on the matter at hand. Shopping.

A trip through the Disney store cheered me up immensely. Only hunger got me out of there and away from all the Toy Story paraphernalia. "Howdy, howdy, howdy," I'd chuckled to myself as I stood at the cash register paying for my purchases. Apparently the clerks were used to adults who regressed, because no one batted an eye.

On my way back to the hotel I picked up dinner, planning for a quiet evening with the TV-or the stunner as my friend Anna called it. Halfway through dinner Jace called.

"Where are you at?" he demanded over what sounded like wind whistling through his truck.

"Salt Lake City, why? Where are you?"

"At your house! What the hell are you doing in Salt Lake? They called me 'cause you missed physical therapy and no one could reach you. Damnit, Jessalyn!"

"Don't talk to me like I've got no sense!" I threw myself against the bed pillows, scrambling to get my thoughts in order.

"Well, sometimes I wonder!"

Despite my irritation with him, I couldn't ignore the concern in his voice. "I needed a break...I found the letter," I softly added. There was no need to tell him who or what the letter said. He'd obviously read it. And it wasn't the only one I'd gotten since December.

Just the last.

The silence on the other end of the phone spoke volumes but didn't answer the question of why he'd thrown it away. "I'm sorry-" for everything was implied. "I'll be fine, just...go rodeo."

I nearly gagged on the "R" word.

"I'm sorry, Jessa," was followed by a heavy sigh. "You just scared me. Are you okay?" he asked, his voice quietly sympathetic.

"I will be as soon as you quit babying me."

"Fine. Just please take care of yourself. I'll crash here tonight, then head back out. If you wanna come keep me company, I'll be leaving about six tomorrow morning."