rilaya // oneshots

~ It's Inevitable ~

"So, is it true?" she asks and you swear you feel yourself break at the hurt in your best friend's voice; pain that you never meant to cause. You're not sure how to respond and frankly, you don't want to – you want to scream and cry and hug her and tell her she's your everything – but you don't. Instead, you stay silent and choke back the sobs you swear you almost let loose.

"Why didn't you tell me?"

Now it's her turn to choke back her tears and you physically feel your heart being ripped from your chest and crushed by a force too powerful to put into words.

"Don't you trust me?"

Of course you trust her, now say something for fuck's sake.

You try to speak or at least that's what you tell yourself. "I'm- I'm sorry" you whisper, somewhat defeated for a reason you can't wrap your head around.

"Hey," her voice is soft and gentle and you would never have guessed it'd been flooded with some kind of seemingly vague disappointment(?) only seconds before.

She pulls you into a hug and you feel your breath hitch in your throat (you'd be lying if you said it was the first time that'd happened in the last 10 minutes).

"Riles," the blonde's voice is layered with sympathy and compassion and nothing but sympathy and compassion, (it confused you to no end), "I don't care who you're into, okay? It doesn't matter to me. I just wish you'd told me yourself."

You never meant for it to happen like this, it wasn't your fault that Farkle 'accidentally' let your secret slip, but it was your fault for keeping it away from her in the first place and it was your fault for waiting for something you knew was bound to happen eventually, and even more so for doing nothing to stop it.

You want to get everything off your chest, you really do because it's just you and her; Riley and Maya – sat in the bay window; the most important place in the world to the pair of you, alone and in an excruciatingly deafening silence.

You hate yourself for holding back and you hate yourself even more for not being able to work your fucking voice.

"There's more" you try to say, though it comes out as more of a squeal and you want to slap yourself for letting your voice break mid-sentence; you don't want her to think you're weak.

"What do you mean, Honey?"

The nickname warms your entire body and for a second – a single second – you feel the warmth in your heart restore itself.

Though it only lasts a brief moment and the emptiness is quick to take its place once again.

She places a hand on yours and for no apparent reason, your entire body tenses up. Instead of pulling away though, she laces your fingers together so the reds and blues of your nails alternate in a fulfilling pattern and in that moment you know for a fact that's exactly how it should be.

Like it was when it was easy.

"There's more that you need to know," you say, unsure of where exactly you're going with your lame excuse of a speech, "no more secrets."

"No more secrets" she repeats, looking at you dead in the eyes.

"I- um" she squeezes your hand and smiles; a small smile that you know is genuine, "I- I just don't want you to treat me any differently. I'm still me, I'm still the same old Riley that you know and-"

"Love."

The word sounds perfect rolling off of her tongue and you feel it; you're dreaming, expect you're not because this is real life and she told you she loves you and it warms your heart like nothing else can but you're not sure she meant it the way you think she did.

"Maya, I love you" you hate how it sounds coming from you, your voice is weaker than hers and to you, it feels as though the word is losing its meaning – it's not; you just think it is.

"And I don't think you realise how much I love you because I wake up every morning and wonder if you're up yet and I go to sleep every night and wonder if you had a good day. Then, I wake up in the middle of the night and call you because I get this feeling you can't sleep... and I'm always right. And then I yell at myself because I missed it throughout the day..."

She sits and listens because you're finally opening up and she's finally there to hear it.

"It's like without you I'd be lost. You guide me, Maya. You make me feel okay and if I didn't have that, I don't know what I'd end up doing."

Your tears are falling and you feel them burning your skin. She wipes them away with the back of her hand and you try so hard to look anywhere but directly into her eyes.

But ultimately, you fail. Miserably.

"Sweetie, I love you too, more than you know," her hand's stroking your cheek now and you're not sure if you should smile or laugh or cry or just walk away from the situation all together, "I'm going to be with you for the rest of your life. It's you and me forever, nothing will ever take away from that." You smile and she smiles back.

"And thank you for being honest with me... I think it's about time I open up to you too."

You're not sure how it happens or who initiated the whole thing but before you can respond, the two of you are leaning in, eyes closed and hands still intertwined. You want to give her a chance to fall back, to re-think this whole thing and explain that she just got caught up in the moment – but she doesn't and neither do you.

She kisses you and you let her and holy fuck, it's the most perfect thing you could have imagined; far better than the dreams and more perfect than the thoughts that strike you at 3am.

Your lips move together perfectly and for the first time in your life, you think that this moment could have actually been inevitable.

By the time you pull apart, she's on top of you and you're lying flat on your back and you're quite literally gasping for air. She smiles, you smile back and before you know it, you're on the floor in a fit of giggles; this is the moment you've been waiting for your whole life and all you can do is laugh about it because for once, something seems too good to be true and for once, it is true.

"So," whispers the blonde, her hands glued to yours and her legs straddling your hips, "you could have told me a long time ago." You hit her playfully and let out another small giggle. It's not fake and neither are you.

You're Riley and Maya; together forever. It's inevitable.

A/N lol, this is shit but it's whatever