Something To Fight For-ppg Boomubbles

Painful Affection

"Funny, how those who you love hurt you the most."
-Unknown (to me at least)

Boomer POV

~~~

   I didn't know what was going on.
   Voices took over, screams rocketing around inside my skull, telling me I was worthless. I was soft for going to the Puffs. I was the mistake. Mojo and Him both were ashamed of me. My brothers were perfect; I was the one that ended up wrong.
   My vision went dark red, like the color of dried blood. Horned figures loomed over me, cackling and flashing sick, twisted grins. I could distantly feel my physical body moving, and as I stared into the demons' - MY demons'- eyes, I could see that they were controlling it.
   "ThEre'S No tUrnIng BacK, BoOmEr..." they whispered, the many voices flowing all around me, piercing my ethereal being. "YoU'rE A MisTakE. AlL YoU Can TruSt Is yoUr SwoRn EneMy, aNd yOu aRe KillInG HeR nOw, aS I spEaK."

   Bubbles...

   No...

   "You monsters! You did this! You're doing this to Bubbles! I'll....I'll kill all of you!"

   They all simultaneously cackled, glowing yellow maws gaping open, sharp teeth glinting. "We Did nOthIng, BoOmEr. YoU aRe doIng It, beCaUse YoU coUlD nOt fiGhT ofF yoUr DemOnS! TwElvE LonG YeArs, We HaVe SaT IdlY aNd GroWn In StreNgTh bEcaUse yOu fAilEd To fiGht uS!"

   A wave of despair crashed over me, suppressing the absolute rage I felt. I'd failed.

   Failed to fight off my own negativity. And because of it, my best friend in the whole world was about to die at my hands.

   I was a disgrace...

   A failure...

   A murderer...

   A liar...

   I deserve nothing.

   Nothing...

   Nothing...

   Not even life. I don't deserve to draw breath.

   My demons are grinning over me, slowly seizing more and more control.

I'm too weak to hold them back.

   My spirit begins to slowly crumble, blow away into dust. My ethereal body dims and becomes more and more transparent. It was never anything worth doing anything for, anyway.. I was worthless...a walking, talking failure...a confused being who was made as a result of a mistake.

   My spirit is thinning out, becoming less solid. I silently beg it to dissipate quicker. I need to disappear. The world will be so much better off. I did nothing but harm.

...

...

...

   "Aaaaugh!"

   The scream is so loud that I hear it even in my detached state. It's there but not there, like my physical body, but it snaps me out of it.

   I may be horrid, but I can't leave yet. Bubbles is hurt, and if I am to save her, I have to fight the demons. I have to try and help her. I'll make amends.