This Broken Beautiful Thing...

Chapter 16

CHAPTER 16:

“I swear to God Jace , you fucking do one more thing to hurt her I swear I will make sure you can’t use that thing between your legs!” I hear Anna yelling softly. I remain still as I eavesdrop on her conversation.

“I promise I’m done, I don’t ever want to hurt her or see that look she gave me today. I promise Anna. Please let me stay with her, I’ll look after her…. please.” I hear Jace’s sad voice as he whispers to Anna.

I feel Anna move as she places me gently on a pillow. I hear her footsteps disappear then the door close. I feel Jace climb onto the bed and lay in front of me I can feel his eyes looking over me and I flinch when his fingers touch my lips. 

“I won’t hurt you baby. Not anymore.” He whispers.

I open my eyes and look into his sad ones but don’t say anything.

“I can’t believe I did this to you baby…I’m such a fuck up.” Jace says softly as he cups my cheek and stares at my nose.

I find my voice as I choose my words ,”Don’t say that Jace…don’t put yourself down like that.”

I look him over noticing his wet hair and the fresh smell coming off him. Thankfully he showered before he came to me. I don’t think I could lie next to him after he smelt like the girl he was banging earlier today.

“It’s true though…I could never have something as pure as you. I’m surprised I didn’t fuck it up sooner. You are too good for me baby.” He says after clearing his throat.

“People need to stop saying that. I’m not the perfect little girl everyone thinks I am. If I was, I wouldn’t be sitting in this situation would I? I don’t know what to do with you Jace, I don’t know what you want and what you expect from me? I’m so scared I say the wrong thing and you get angry with me. I get so scared when you get angry.” I say grimacing at the memory of how mean he gets when he's upset.

“I just want you Harley, I want you safe…with me. Please baby…don’t be scared of me…I’ll never hurt you I promise.“ he says sadly as he lifts my shirt and places it on my lower belly and rubs it softly.

“I had a sister once, well I never met her but I had one. Mom was an addict and we thought maybe she would stop with the drugs when she fell pregnant. She was eight months pregnant when she overdosed. She killed the baby…. I lost my little sister.” He says out of the blue, the sadness coming from his voice causes tears in my eyes.

No wonder he is so protective over me and my baby.

“I’m sorry Jace. I’m so…so sorry. That is horrible. Oh…my…God.” I let out a shaky breath as the tears fall and soak into my pillow and I cover his warm large rough hand that’s on my belly with my much smaller cold one.

“Yeah…me too.” He whispers.

I pick up his hand and kiss it then place it back on my tummy.

“Did you really feel that way when you saw him? Did you feel safe with him? Even after everything he did?” Jace says flatly.

“The truth?” I ask him and he nods.

“Yeah I did, I’m scared of you Jace. You can be really mean and its like one minute you say you want me and you care about me and the next you’re…you’re….the next thing I hear is some girl screaming your name or I see some girl giving you head. Then i'm good enough to be your sleeping buddy because you sleep easy when you’re next to me? How do you think that makes me feel? It hurts so much Jace. It feels that I’m not good enough for you. This hurts more than what Caleb did to me… with you its as if that night I caught him with Ashley is on repeat except it’s a different girl and its being rubbed in my face.” He tries to talk but I place my hand on his mouth to stop him.