Intertwined (Published)

The Stupid Family Tradition

Tradition

All families have a tradition.  Some go all the way back to their ancestors in the eighteenth centuries, some just started one in the twentieth century.

I don’t know when my family tradition started.  But one thing is for sure… this tradition doesn’t make a single inch of sense.

But one cannot choose the family he or she will belong to.  And you cannot choose which family traditions you will end up honoring in your life.

My family has close ties.  If some people could sit together in parties not even knowing they are related, I had to know each and everyone of my cousins, aunts and uncles.  We have family reunions about twice a year.  In between those reunions, my family pretty much engage in gossiping about each other.  They have the chance to confirm these gossips during the reunions.

They especially like the women in our family who are approaching their thirties.  It’s the finish line for them.  According to my family tradition, we have a curse.  If one of our women is not married before she turns thirty-one, they are doomed to be single for life.

I thought this was a complete bull.  But I’ve got Aunt Rosalie, who sits in family reunions alone.  She got her heart broken when she was thirty.  The guy left her at the altar.  Ten years later, she was still single and no hopes of ever marching down the altar.

They also have Aunt Mildy.  Full of love, this one.  So full of love, she pass on from lover to lover and none of them ever wanted to put a ring on her finger.  Now, rumor has it, she’s a mistress of a rich Sultan, who comes to see her once every two months.  She lives a luxurious life though.  But still a mistress in the eyes of her family.

There was also Theresa.  One of my elder cousins.  Pretty and successful.  But it was her choice to be single.  She is a lesbian.  She has no desire to be married to a man.  So I guess that was not really the workings of a curse.

One of our elder Aunts got married at thirty-two, giving the women in our families hope that the curse was just a lore our old ancestors say to ensure the elders will always have grandchildren to dote on.  But a week after she got married, her husband died.  And she had remained a widow since then.

There were many stories of aunts and cousins who disregarded the tradition.  I don’t know whether it was just coincidence but somehow, they are in the family’s Hall of Shame… the unwritten list of women in our family who had tragedy or bad luck fall upon them because they disregarded the family’s thirty year old dead line.

And so, ever since I was young, I had been a hopeless romantic.  I read all sorts of fairy tales and love stories, hoping someday, one of those love stories will come true to me.  That my knight in shining armor will come to rescue me, sweep me off my feet and rush me to the altar… and all of that had to happen by the time I am thirty!

More than the fear of living my life alone, childless or husband-less, I refuse to be the subject of my family’s talks and gossips during reunion tables.  I hate it whenever the table is all abuzz and then it suddenly falls silent when Aunt Rosalie or Aunt Mildy joins the table, and every single person in the table picks a different topic to talk about at the top of their heads.

By hook or by crook, I vowed… I will be married before the deadline!  It would be a plus if my prince will be all handsome and capable of giving me the life I deserve.  But I guess, compared to the chitchats and the impending curse that will be bestowed upon me, I would much rather marry an ogre.

I have years to my quest.  Two decades to plan my ever after is a lot of time.