The Scandal

15. Risen

A/N: last chapter got more activity than normal, thanks! :) probably due to the leolivia i'm sure

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It had been nine days since season three ended, and two days since I'd heard from Leo. He'd texted me twice just basically asking 'how are you' and I'd just say I was fine, and everything was good, and it kind of ended the conversation. He was probably just talking to me because his parents said he had to, that it was the responsible, or respectable, or polite thing to do. His parents were like that. I could see them doing that.

I'd spent all my time in my room, just as I said I would, up until Saturday, which was when me and my family got on a plane to go to Tennessee and see my Dad's side of the family for Easter.

A lot of problems arose from that, but two in particular that were worrying me most were:

1. I didn't want to go to church. Not even on Easter. Nothing I wore could hide the fact that I was an obvious sinner, obviously damned to an eternity in Hell. They'd all know. They'd probably all already heard. They were probably all told to pray for me.

2. I didn't want to see my Dad's side of the family; I didn't ever know them as well as I did my Mom's. I hadn't even seen them in over a year, and usually when I did see them, I talked to my cousin Mary, who was the epitome of a Mary. She was a goody-goody, sweetheart Christian straight-A student I'm-better-than-you bitch. My boy cousins were misogynistic jerks, so I didn't like hanging out with them, but I did sometimes when Mary became too much. But to pinpoint the largest issue behind all of that: I was pregnant, and they were all going to act weird about it, or even possibly be rude.

When we arrived, it was all I was afraid of.

"Everyone's looking at me," I whispered to my Mom, tugging at her sleeve.

"No they're not, Olivia," she said, sounding dismissive, tired like she didn't feel like dealing with me.

When we got to my aunt Marie's house, where we were staying, she and my uncle Brad and my cousin Tommy all treated me differently. Not in an obvious way, but just a vague discomfort, and Marie asked me if we'd started thinking about what we'd do with the nursery, because she was an interior designer and she could help. I told her I'd thought about it a little bit, then changed the subject and none of them had mentioned anything baby-related since then, and Brad and Tommy didn't look me right in the eyes much.

Because of the way they'd acted toward me, I went to church feeling nervous and awkward—even more so than I thought I would. I was paranoid.

After my Mom acted so tired of me, I went to my Dad, grabbing his arm, and pulling him down to my level.

"Dad, don't you think everyone's staring at me?"

He shook his head, standing up straighter. "No, honey, no," he promised. "And if they are, it's because you look beautiful." He put his arms around me and hugged me to his side.

It was cheesy, and I knew he was just saying it to make me feel better, but I took it because it was a better response than my Mom's.

In the church service, we stood as the choir sang, and it felt like we stood for hours, but it was really about six songs. When we finally sat down, we had communion, so they passed out the grape juice ('wine' in a Baptist church) in the usual tiny glasses and the mini tasteless crackers.

Looking down at that, I remembered when I was eight and I got to take it for the first time. My parents had always told me I had to get baptized before I ate the Lord's Supper with all of them, and I was so excited to finally be able to do it. I accepted Christ into my heart and I could finally have grape juice and a cracker in church.