dear broken boy,

chapter 4.

I woke up, unfortunately. My social worker called me in first thing, as I was brushing my teeth I was wondering.. Did I do something wrong? I changed and walked to her office. She told me my dad came in last night, and was sent away. He'd be coming the next day. Oh god. I didn't want to face him. I just told her okay, and went to the dining room for breakfast. As usual, he was sitting there bright and early. He always manages to talk about things and make me smile. Maybe he treats everyone like this. I'm not special. We ate breakfast together and went to classes again. We were making stress balls out of flour and balloons.. I have no fucking idea what's going on in this mental unit, but I went with it. Flour went everywhere and it took many attempts to get the flour in the balloon. I guess I was happy with the final result. It was a good distraction honestly, I grew a habit of throwing it up in the air and catching it and just getting lost in doing that one action. Once that "class" of arts and crafts, we went out to the huge balcony and all the other kids played with soccer balls and footballs, I just sat there on a ledge playing with my.. Flour-balloon thing? I felt like I was being watched. I always felt like that though.. but this was an exception. "hey!" I said to get his attention. he was sitting alot further from me and looked like he was lost. I got up and I sat next to him, and I started wondering.."What got you into here?" I asked. No way in not finding out if I just ask the kid nicely. "Im not really sure what I have. But saw things and I felt really bad. I saw strange things, but it was mostly of me dying a lot." I just replied with a simple "oh." "And you?" I heard him say trying to get my thoughts off of him and onto myself. "Went paralyzed at 4 am because of a panic attack. Had no choice but I don't mind, I like it better here because of the air conditioning and the fact that I met these people." I told him. "You're really optimistic despite what you went through." He said while smiling. His smile is charming. I would hate it if he cried. The nurses thought we were getting a little too close, so they ended the outside time and they gave us warning looks. I didn't know you weren't allowed to make friends. Well, I was the type to break rules. We broke for lunch and Elizabeth was one of the ladies that would be with us along with Donna, all of the patients, including me began to eat. We had to do daily check ins, and today was about complementing other people. "You're very handsome!" Elizabeth told him. I sat there next to him, looking down and realizing it myself. He's really cute. And we continued the round table discussion. All I said was "I'm a good friend." I think that's true, or so I thought.