Long Distance

Jade on the Outside

I walked through the crowded hallways at my university, searching for any sight of a familiar face. I found one, scanned the facial features and decided it useless to try and make contact. Getting pushed over, I slowly stood up and started my trek again, to the parking lot.
Entering my car, I inserted the keys and turned it on. Instant A/C. I sat back, instinctively taking my leather jacket off and throwing it to the passenger's spot. Looking behind me, I backed up my car until I finally could turn and head off to the roads, before finally reaching my shared apartment.
Halfway through the noiseless ride, my thoughts started to finally gain consciousness, bringing with it an anxiety attack and headache. I pulled over for a moment, struggled to find anti-anxiety pills in my glove box. After taking a pill, I pulled back onto the street, turning the radio on for extra effort.
"I'm home," I said to no one in particular as my cat, Axel, tried to jump into my arms. My roommate, Mikah, yelled from the living room, waving a gloved hand.
"Yo! Jade! How was school?"
I sighed. "It would've been better if you actually attended any classes today." Mikah pouted.
"I attend some classes!"
"Not all.." Sighing for the umpteenth time, I poured myself a glass of water and went to go see what my roommate was watching. Looking up at the TV she was staring intently at, I realized I didn't give a fuck, for the last time today, about what anyone else does. Like, seriously, everyone's an asshole.

I'm Jade. I'm twenty two and an idiot. My grades are shit, it's a miracle I have an apartment and job, though normally my roommate pays for my rent as well. I'm just not good at school, I've never been. I totally realize that it's important to stay in school and such, and I completely agree. I just am bad at it. Calculus? No. History? No. I'm bad at everything.
I look how I feel. Bad. My choppy blonde hair is cut short, above my shoulders. I never take off my leather jacket, I'm a stereotype.

I moved across the apartment to get to the bedroom, where I then sat on the ledge on the window. I stared at the sky, sun slowly setting. Our apartment had a nice view or the Eiffel Tower. Cheesy, I know, but it was beautiful.
I sat there for a moment, being peaceful, happy. Then things got worse. My thoughts came back, each one worse than the last, and with every word, the weight in my chest grew heavier. A panic attack.
I felt like Atlas, holding up everything to keep me from breaking. Quickly, I stood and ran to the kitche where Mikah was beginning to make dinner. Pushing past her, I placed a hand on the sink while the other frantically searched for anti anxiety pills. Mikah, being that I ran into her, obviously noticed. She helped me reach the pills, and got me a glass of water.
She soothed me, speaking calming words to me. "It'll be over soon," She kept reminding me.
Mikah is the nicest person you'll ever meet. Her looks are kind of intimidating at first- pieces nose, lips, eyebrows, and ears, pink hair shaved half off, black fishnets- but she is so sweet. She knows how to take care with anything, and she does.

After the attack was over- it took a while- Mikah moved back to the kitchen to start the pasta. I was seated at the table, laptop out, browsing the internet. A couple thoughts were making their way back in, but I didn't feel like bothering Mikah again.
Then I met her.