My Love for Her

7: I love her, I love her not

If anyone has the time to vote/leave me suggestions it would be greatly appreciated, thanks!

Kim and I were forced to explain all about vampires to Kyle, after Olivia's outburst. Admittedly, Kim explained more than I did, since she obviously knew more than I did. We watched his face go from shock, to disbelief, to anger, and then finally to acceptance and understanding.

"You know, if anybody else tried to tell me this insane story, there's no way I'd believe them. But, you two...  I know you too well. I'd know if you were lying, or gone crazy."

I smiled. "You have no idea how much I wish we were crazy, man. It would make so much more sense than all of this."

"Yeah, and maybe if we were crazy, you know, instead of vampires, you and Olivia might still be together."

"Oh, Kim, I can't talk about Olivia," I shook my head. "It hurts to think about, honestly."

"You could be so happy with her, Al-"

"No. I can't be with her like this."

Kim looked so upset, I wished I could tell her something else.

"She loves you, Alice. Really, she does!"

"And I loved her. But, she's different now, Kim. She's not the girl I loved."

"But she is. The only thing different is her diet!"

"I saw Nicholas almost kill somebody today. Do you expect me to believe that he would have done that as a human?"

"Maybe, I mean he was a fucked up guy!"

I sighed. "Everything is different now, Kim. I used to dream about spending the rest of my life with Olivia. We had every last detail worked out, you know? We were going to finish college. We were going to spend our twenties travelling. She was going to get au pair work across Europe, and maybe America, Asia... I'd be able to follow her as a photographer. We were going to come back and rent a place in Dublin together, save up until we could get a mortgage, get a house on the outskirts. We weren't going to adopt kids, you know? We were probably going to go with surrogacy. We thought two kids. I was going to carry them! We had a plan, Kim. An entire future. And now, all of that is gone. We can't have the future we planned, our ideal, perfect future. She's not going to age, she's going to be 19 forever. Literally, forever. She's going to kill people. How are we supposed to have a relationship, no matter how much we used to love each other? How could I love someone who kills to survive?"

"She might not kill, though."

"Nicholas said you've hurt humans, since you changed."

Kim looked ashamed. "It was right at the start, when it was all new. The power, the strength... It went to my head. I reeled it in."

"Did you kill anyone?"

"Everything was strange and-"

"Did you kill anyone?"

"Alice, please-"

"Did you kill anyone?"

"Yes."

"Whoa, shit, Kim. You've killed people?" Kyle asked.

"Yes, Kyle, I have. It's a huge regret, and I don't want to talk about it."

"You can't just not talk about it Kim, you're a killer!" I exclaimed.

She shushed me. "I don't want to be! I can't help it, okay? I'm doing my best, but sometimes there's just nothing I can do about it! I need blood to survive, Alice. Accept it."