Jimin's last relationship was great.
Well that's if you don't include the sex...
What happens when Jimin finds someone who takes him to extreme heights of pleasure?
To heights Jimin didn't even know he could reach?
I thought things were going so well with us I was going to propose tomorrow for our 2 year anniversary.
I just can't believe that after almost 2 years he decided to tell me.
Was he really trying hard to not hurt me? Or was he just leading me on so that I would be broken?
"Areyouinsanelikeme Beeninpainlikeme"
Jimin wouldn't do that though. 2 years is long enough to know his habits so how didn't I know he was faking. How did he manage to fake an orgasm for 2 years. Who was he thinking of when he cummed.
Maybe I'm over thinking this all.
Or maybe my phobia is coming back.
"Thesevoiceswon'tleavemealone"
Fuck!
Jimin helped me forget my phobia. He constantly made me feel as though I was good enough but now... now I don't know.
I need to call my mum.
*ring* *ring* *ring* *ring* "Honey, how are you doi..."
"Mum my atelophobia is coming back and I can't breath"
"Myheartisgoldandmy handsare cold"
"Oh my... Honey, Honey tell me what happened"
"Well Jimin told me I couldn't... t-t-that I cou-couldn't satisfy h-him and now he's g-g-gone"
"Honey, please. Deep breaths. Close your eyes and breathe in deeply okay"
"Okay"
"Honey keep breathing deeply I'll be over soon okay"
"Thanks mum"
*beep*
My mum always knew how to help whether we baked or danced around she knew how to distract me from my phobia.
I told her everything no matter what it was. She was my best friend.
We were in this together
But she couldn't cure my phobia and to be honest I don't think anyone ever can. No amount of therapy will help me to cure this constant hate trapped inside me.
At night when I can't sleep because my phobia takes over all I ever loved and all I will ever love, I think about the multiple ways of commiting suicide and sometimes I don't eat hoping that I'll lose the fat that forever seems to cling to my body.
My phobia brings pain and suffering and my mum can never fix that. I'm forever a burden to her and one day I finally won't be.
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