I forgot my password to my other one. My other account is actually open for two years, because I never logged out of it. So . .. I guess here I am - marking the first real tragedy of my life. Getting locked out of my own wattpad account is a real kicker. I'm sighing right now, but obviously you won't be able to hear it.
What am I writing? My life suck. I'm putting in lines that never make sense(to me), and god am I so slow. I'm putting words that may never exist later, because I might delete it.
But really, I'm just sad. I'm fucking you, and you, and the rest of the crappy year will give me. I bestowed this gift of crappy lines and maybe some poetry later, on myself. I am so fucked.
Life is not hard, it's just not there anymore. I can't feel it. Like how I'm feeling these keys under the tips of my fingers. My nails getting caught and scratching the surfaces of things. The sound of the tapping echoing inside the dark room of unsettlement. I'm unsettled. I'm settled in my desk, and confined inside my own head full of bitterness.
This well inside of me is emptied of its confidence. I have what I need, and want. But I don't have the want anymore. What do I even want?
What the hell am I proving to you? To me?
How fucked is this exactly?
Some bad literature.
